Curriculum Vitae

                                  You can't stop it You can't escape it You can't turn it off

So I'd appreciate your kind consideration in this matter

Sir or Mam would you please turn it the fuck up

Do it



Unleashed in the east

Best dressed in the west

Sorted in the north

Without a doubt in the south



The queen of queenbees

Lioness of Juda

Phoenix from the ashes risen



Undefeated undisputed featherweight champion

on all five continents



World record holder with a high score of two gazillion in Tetris

Two-time recipient of the Nobel prize for super foxiest female ever

and war time consigliere to the Cosa Nostra



She split the storm, invented the x-ray, the cure for AIDS, and the surprise blindfold greeting



She performed and choreographed the fights for Bruce Lee in Enter the Dragon

and Game of death and still does stunt doubles for Jackie Chan on the weekends



She suckerpunched Einstein, outsmarted Ali, and even outsuperfreaked Rick James

She's the founder and CEO of Konichiwa Records

The most decorated professional field operative in the industry

and in the streets

With a perfect track record since kindergarden where she used to

whoop schoolboy ass



She's listed in section 202 of the United Nations Security Act of 1979

as being too hot to wear tight sweaters on international airspace

In this world of tension pressure and pain

she is known by men and women of all origin and faith

for her wisdom, compassion, and relentless

determination in the quest to get paid