May the Bird of Paradise Fly Up Your Nose

                                  One fine day as I was a-walkin' down the street

Spied a beggar man with rags upon his feet

Took a penny from my pocket

In his tin cup I did drop it

I heard him say as I made my retreat



[Chorus:]

May the bird of paradise fly up your nose

May an elephant caress you with his toes

May your wife be plagued with runners in her hose

May the bird of paradise fly up your nose



The laundry man is really on his toes

Found a hundred-dollar bill among my clothes

When he called me I came a-runnin'

Gave him back his dime for phonin'

I heard him sayin' as I turned to go



[Chorus]



I was way behind one day to catch the train

Taxi driver said "We'll make it just the same"

The speed cop made it with us

And as he wrote out the ticket

I stood by politely a-waitin' for my change



[Chorus x3]