What Do I Have to Do?

I am not here
I think I've never
Been here at all
Or ever will

I feel like a place
Where no one goes anymore
Why can't you see that everything's broken?
And why can't you see that my life's turned gray?

I can't believe in anything sacred
When I don't believe that I am real



It seems so bizarre
But none of this matters
Thoughts disappear and hopes have died
But now I am safe nothing can hurt me here

Why can't you see my need for forgiveness
The truth and the lies so confused as one
I can't believe in anything sacred
When I don't believe in anything

I am alone
Locked in my memories
There's nowhere left for me to hide
But I am not real

I've made all I am with lies
Why does it seem that everything's different?
And why does it seems that only you are real?
I don't believe in anything sacred
So why do I feel so damned alone?

[Chorus]

I need someone to break the silence
Screaming in my head
And in my soul

I feel it slipping away
I feel it slipping away
I gave it all but no one cared
I feel it slipping away
I feel it slipping away
My God it's slipping away
I gave it all but no one cared
I feel it slipping away

I feel it slipping away
I feel it slipping away
No more pain and no more fear
I feel it slipping away

I just can't learn to forget
I'm choking on the memories
Choking on regret
I tried but I can't find a way
To untangle all the pieces
After they've been thrown away

I will not suffer this loss
Of you again and again and again
I refuse to continue to live
In this perpetual nightmare
I decide it ends right here

I feel it slipping
I feel it slipping
Everything is slipping away

You are all I am, you are all I ever want to be
I think of you
A solitary cry echoes through my throat and through my mind
I think of you
I think I woke up screaming
I had a dream that you still loved me
I think I woke up screaming
For hours I'll just stare at my ceiling at nothing at all
And think of you
The candlelight through bells make shadows just like rosees in my mind
And I think of you

I think I woke up screaming
I had a dream that you still loved me
I think I woke up screaming again

Could this last forever?
Or will I die?
Could this last forever?
Or will I die?
Just can I die?

Maybe I could try to take a bath and drink a little wine
And think of you
But probably I'll lie naked on the floor by candlelight
And I'll think of you

I think I woke up screaming
I had a dream that you still loved me
I think I woke up screaming again
I had a dream that you still loved me
I think I woke up screaming again
I think I woke up (repeat)
Screaming again

There are times
When I'm just a shell
When I do not feel anything for anyone
All I feel is hollow & bruised
Used up & mis-used
Forced to be soneone I don't
Want to be

Have I failed somehow or some way
Will the weight of today
Finally pull me down to drown
In the depths of despair
Where I am alone
Except for my rage?

My rage...My pain...
I hate... My darkest days

You make it hard to breathe
It's as if I'm suffocating
And when you're next to me
I can feel your heartbeat through my skin
It makes me sad to think
This all could be for nothing
I wish there was a way
For you to see inside of me
I've never felt this way
About anyone or anything
Tell me
What do I have to do to make you happy?
What do I have to do to make you understand?
What do I have to do to make you want me?
And, if I can't make you want me
What do I have to do?

I know exactly what you're thinking
But I swear this time I will not let you down
I'm not as selfish as I used to be
That was a part of me that never made me proud
Right now I think I would try anything
Anything at all to keep you satisfied
God I hope you see what loving you would do to me
All I want is one more chance, so tell me...
What do I have to do to make you love me?