Common Sense

It was a teenage wedding
And the old folks wished 'em well
You could see that pierre
Did truly love the mademoiselle.
And the young monsieur and madame
Have rung the chapel bell,
"c'est la vie,"
-say the old folks
It goes to show that you never can tell

They furnished off an apartment
With a two room roebuck sale
The coolerator was filled
With t.v. dinners and ginger ale
But when pierre found work,
The little money comin' worked out well
"c'est la vie,"
-say the old folks
It goes to show that you never can tell

They had a hi-fi phono
Boy, did they let it blast
Seven hundred little records
All rock, rhythm and jazz
But when the sun went down
The rapid tempo of the music fell
"c'est la vie,"
-say the old folks
It goes to show that you never can tell

They bought a souped up jitney
'twas a cherry in fifty-three
They drove it down to new orleans
To celebrate their anniversary.
It was there where pierre was wedded
To the lovely mademoiselle,
"c'est la vie,"
-say the old folks
It goes to show that you never can tell

It was a teenage wedding
And the old folks wished 'em well
You could see that pierre
Did truly love the mademoiselle.
And the young monsieur and madame
Have rung the chapel bell,
"c'est la vie,"
-say the old folks
It goes to show that you never can tell

The last time that i saw her
She was standing in the rain
With her overcoat under her arm
Leaning on a horsehead cane
She said "carl, take all the money"
She called everybody carl
"my spirit's broke"
"my mind's a joke,"
"and getting up's real hard"

Chorus
Don't you know her
When you see her?
She grew up
In your back yard
Come back to us
Barbara lewis
Hare krishna
Beauregard

Selling bibles at the airports
Buying quayludes on the phone
Hey, you talk about
A paper route
She's a shut in without a home
God save her, please
She's nailed her knees
To some drugstore parking lot
Hey, mr. brown
Turn the volume down
I believe this evening's shot

Repeat chorus

Can't you picture her next thursday?
Can you picture her at all?
In the hotel boulderado
At the dark end of the hall
I gotta shake myself and wonder
Why she even bothers me
For if heartaches were commercials
We'd all be on t.v.

Repeat chorus

It's wedding day in funeralville
Your soup spoon's on your right
The king and queen will alternate
With the refrigerator light
They'll be boxing on the t.v. show
The colored kids will sing
Hoo ray for you
And midnight's oil
Lets burn the whole damn thing

Felicia is my dark horse girl
I'll take her if it rains
She throws up punch
Upon the host
And says many stupid things
But she ain't so bad
When we're all alone
She's as different
As can be
She's a part a my heart
Don'tcha pull us apart
She's like one of the family

Chorus
Oh no! trouble in the attic
Won't somebody turn on a lite
Got so, so many troubles
Can't even tell
Wrong from right
I'm gonna comb my hair
Darn my socks
Tip my hat
And say goodnight
It's wedding day in funeralville
What shall i wear tonight?
It's wedding day in funeralville
What shall i wear tonight?

My car is stuck in washington
And i cannot find out why
Come sit beside me on the swing
And watch the angels cry
It's anybody's ballgame
It's everybody's fight
And the streetlamp said
As he nodded his head
It's lonesome out tonight

Repeat chorus

Forbidden jimmy
Has got a mighty sore tooth
From biting too many dimes
In a telephone booth
He's got half of his bootlace
Tied to the dial
Thank you operator
For getting jimmy to smile

"call out the coast guard"
Screamed the police
Forbidden jimmy
He's got three water skis
He put two on his wavelength
And gave one to his girl
She's a mighty fine person
It's a mighty fine world

Chorus:
I'm gonna make all your sorrows bright
Set your soul free
I'll see you tomorrow night
If i can still see

Ginger caputo
And dorian gray
Oughtta stay out of pictures
If they got nothin' to say
Stack 'em back on the rack jack
Ya know, you're hurting my eye
Forbidden jimmy
He's getting ready to fly

Repeat chorus

I got caught cooking popcorn
And calling it hail
They wanna stick my head
Inside a water pail
Ya know, they're gonna be sorry
They're gonna pay for it too
Forbidden jimmy
He's coming straight at you

There's a rainbow of babies
Draped over the graveyard
Where all the dead sailors
Wait for their brides
And the cold bitter snow
Has strangled each grassblade
Where the salt from their tears
Washed out with the tide

Chorus
And i smiled on the wabash
The last time i passed it
Yes i gave her a wink
From the passenger side
And my foot fell asleep
As i swallowed my candy
Knowing he was in heaven
Before he died

Now the harbor's on fire
With the dreams and desires
Of a thousand young poets
Who failed 'cause they tried
For a rhyme without reason
Floats down to the bottom
Where the scavengers eat 'em
And wash in with the tide

Repeat chorus:

The sun can play tricks
With your eyes on the highway
The moon can lay sideways
Till the ocean stands still
But a person can't tell
His best friend he loves him
Till time has stopped breathing
You're alone on the hill

Repeat chorus:

I'm beginning to like you
But, you know that ain't right
'cause you'll just twist and twist and twist
Till i'm all crooked inside

Then you'll take all you gave me
Like it never was there
And i think that i might, no! i know
Yes, i will help you there
'cause ...

Chorus
I've done it before
And i'd do it again
'cause it's the only time
That makes me feel like i'm
My own best friend

I'm a victim of friction i just got too close to see
Yeah, we sparked in the dark and god hung a light on me
And the lamp gets real heavy and it hangs from my heart
And it comes, and it goes
Till i can't tell the difference apart
But ...

Repeat chorus

So many people say
It'll never work out that way
You can't stand the heat
While you're watching your heart
Just melt away in the basement
On a rainy day
La la la
La la la
La lala
Lalala la lalaaaaaaaaaa ...

There's motel in shreveport
Don't ask me where, please
They check in, they check out
By the light of the color t.v.s
And the maid calls you honey
And she makes your bed slow
And she speaks, of the sheets that don't fit
But you know that she knows
That ...

Repeat chorus