Basketball Shorts

Hey man, i saw you standing there
You were bobbing your head to the beat as your fists start to clinch
Oh so tight
"no fear" in your eyes, and also on your shirt (and hat and pants)
It's your turn to show tonight, do your best to start a fight
Show us all that you can dance with your elbows and your hands
(dancing with friends, keeping the peace, if you didn't know i'm being sarcastic)
When you feel the crowd start to move
Please try to resist the urge that you get
Try not to get upset and sock your neighbor right in the face
I know that coach meant well
But what's a dance to you is a fight to someone else
Keep your anger aside, kick back, enjoy the ride
And think how it could be if you showed some courtesy
Your hostility, it grows so easily
You're the next victim of the dance that broke my jaw
Please don't get near
You're the next victim of the dance that broke my jaw
Have some more beer, "no fear gear" is what you wear
Just because the music begins
Does not always mean a wrestling scene from wwf
Breaks out right to my left
And i got a ringside ticket
I'll challenge you or anyone anywhere
Sometimes i just want the football thrown in
Let the football game begin
And then say to myself as i think of someone else
That's not what we came here for, we'll take no more
What's going through your head?
To the point that someone is dead
Keep it up and you're out of here, you're out of here
And when you're outside by yourself and sitting all alone
Keep your head down
Cause we're the ones that warned you
You're the next victim of the dance that broke my jaw
Please don't get near
You're the next victim of the dance that broke my jaw
Can't we just be friends in here?
Go drink some more beer
Kick your neighbor's rear
Elbow to my ear
Can't we just be friends in here?
I was dancing by myself, and bothering no one else
When suddenly i was encountered by the beast
I ask so politely, "please just let me be"
But the next thing i remember, i'm staring at the ceiling
Someone please, help me call security
Was on my feet, but now i'm on the floor
That shithead doesn't show respect to me or to you
So now he's out the door
Not gonna hurt us anymore
That dance floor is free of hostility
And i'm so glad he's gone
It's our turn to have fun
My message was clear, "we're all friends in here"
But we're not allowed to do the dance that broke my jaw

I recognize that typical, cynical smile you wear on the front row
I can hear you telling everyone about the other show
You're the one with all of the friends
But none are real cause you're a hypocrite
Just remember that you did it yourself and you wonder how
Just don't stick your foot in your mouth
Never thought before you spoke
You tell me what i want to hear
Turn around and tell another
Who you think you know
Did you really think it wouldn't get back to me
Fabrications that you spun so well
Always ready with a tabloid story to tell
So don't complain to me
Shut your mouth and go quietly
Cause it didn't have to be like this and you wonder how
Just don't stick your foot in your mouth
Didn't have to be this way
You tell me what i want to hear
Turn around and tell another
Who you think you know
But no one cares what you wanna say
Don't bug me or any other
Shut your mouth and go
How can you live with yourself
Knowing all the lies that you tell
How can you live with yourself
I know what you want and what you'll do
To get your foot in the door or to just break through
But you're never gonna get to where you want right now
Cause you stick your foot in your mouth
All you have to do is change

Stolen a bike, take it for a ride
Commit a crime, thought you got away
Pick on a kid, only half the size
Karma patrol's gonna set it straight
Who's to say what's coming or going?
They're the ones who call the shots
And endless search for those who've not
Paid for their delinquent way
Cause personal catastrophes
There's a saying
A little better one than the previous
When you're mischievous
You'll get what you deserve
And it's a beautiful thing
All the liquid coming out the gutter cause
What's done is done
I can't change the past
Karma patrol is gonna get me (last)
Something happened just the other day
You helped another from another
But there's nothing coming back your way
Nobody said that life was fair
So lift your head and understand
That doing good is fine
But don't expect to find your plate full
Because the karma patrol is blind to the fact
Except that no one's perfect all the time
Raining down, walking home
When they come, you will know
All looks good, mind your way
Now you're going to pay
(better watch your back cause)
They've got a target on you
No matter what you do
And the water will come down
So jump to the side
Or you'll get soaked straight through
To the bone
That's what they've shown
They have no preference for the good or the evil
But i just know one day
They'll be coming my way

Me and my friends kickin' in the household
Tryin' to figure out thoughts start to unfold
Nothing to do or see i can't understand
Combine all our thoughts to come up with a plan
Car alarm system too expensive to buy
But not if you're gonna hire this guy
With a helmet on his head and a club in his hand
Cock in sock, it's the naked jock man
Naked, naked, naked, jock
Naked, naked, naked, man
Tall dark man going to break into my car
With naked jock man he ain't gonna get far
Car alarm sounds, trunk lifts up
He jumps to the ground
What the fuck's that?
I can hear him scream in fright
Naked jock man just ruined his night
You can run, you can hide, just turn yourself in
Cause he'll get you in the end
He's the naked jock man
And he's after dan
Naked jock man
R-y-a-n
Now months have passed since the birth of the jock man
Sally jesse raphael and david letterman
Want the jock man to show his face
He's the next bitch on melrose place
Naked jock man was just a big joke
Now you'll see his ass on all the talk shows
The people want to know
They're willing to die
Who the fuck is that guy?

As i roll over in my bed, the same old thoughts run through my head
What are you getting up for
I look outside, the night still rules, an incarcerated fool
And my prison cell is school
So i open the door to my new day, bad thoughts should go away
But the morning is so grey
How am i supposed to understand a word they're going to say?
My mind's just not awake
Today's the day i break away from this life of monotony
And i arrive and kick my way to class, sit down
Head down on the fake wood
Instructor starts to speak about the time when man was ape
And though i'm trying really hard, my mind won't cooperate
It tells me where i should be, in the sun where life is carefree
That's when i say, can i just go away and learn some other day?
Cause i can't live by the rules established by the school
An educated fool
People always say to me, go to school so you can be
Listen hard and fill your mind's potential, or lack there of
But sometimes i'm not in class just cause that i will not pass
He walks around and stops at me, my letter comes after "e"
A, d, doesn't matter much to me
A, d, doesn't say shit about me
A, d, doesn't matter much to me
Cause a or d is not me