1. _ Shame, Rights & Privilege
Stumbling drunk off a bus downtown
You've got it bad for the system
'Cause you know it let you down
You see the marks on the whores
And the dimes they lent you
And your paranoia soars
On the wings of your dementia
Without a system that compels
The growth of human compassion
Its a face that will never change
Nobodys well when ever one soul suffers
We're bound by circumstances
We cant dissarrange
Does shame prevent you
>From engaging in the indigents struggle
Just filling up a vacancy
With nothing new to live for
When I was young and naive
I believed I could be so much more
Out of touch with a world
That never cared or knew me
More dead than alive
when you stare right through me
Its a face that will never, never change
never change
You could be the one
With your hand held out
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2. _ Saccharine
Lie in a hedgrow
I have grown bigger than
Two timing a talk show
We pitch the perfect plan
Like leather and concrete
Find strength in sterile eyes
Downtown where the tracks meet
Rain bleeds from swollen skies
And we're all trapped inside this maze
Caught breaking sweats while counting days
Struck down behind the wreckage
Of our less than perfect ways
The brave ones die with no regrets
She wants the one she never gets
Until its over
Stabbing their backs now
Frail lies make perfect sense
Caught grazing the cash cow
With a straight faced innocence
Still rising above this
You'll go on like your taught
Such incredible likeness
and lack of thought
And we've got it
Slow mold pathetic lies
Stripped clean and sterilized
We all go under the knife
with the game show anesthesia
anesthesia
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3. _ Dylan
I heard you threw your phone away
A brave attempt at dodging sympathy
And maybe you're right
Who needs checking up on anyway?
But I remember when I felt my worst
Its friends like you I called on first
The shadows of what seemed so sure
Haunt you as you tread alone
The empty house you bought with her
But even when you're torn apart
Worlds away I feel your pain
And carry you inside my heart
I will search my acquaintance
For a close-lipped friend
With strength and understanding
When I think Ive reached my end
I want to hear your voice again
And it would be so sad
If I learned you never even tried to call me up
But its not so bad
When you remember you've got friends to pick you up
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4. _ Boxing Day
When one browbeating lasts a lifetime
I cant recall the last time
Quiet conversation served
Whats left to solve by mute indifference?
Still we carry on this way
Prescribed and uninvolved
This holds no ordinary pretext
This isnt one more thing we can endeavor to deny
Fighting back tears wont stop the bleeding
Left to bite each others heads off
We forget to even try
Seems its never time
Its never time
Seems its never time
Its never time
Your face disturbs my sleep
You interrupt my savage dreams
I'd trade this vision
For just one more shot at you
Just beyond the setting sun
I can see the cities skyline receding
And these old lines
And these old lines keep repeating
yeah..
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5. _ The Process
Braced against the grip of choices
Memories of the gentle ways
Stained by a thousand voices
Yearning for a shaft of light
Catergorized
And labeled an affliction
Delivered naked into this world
Dehumanized
And cast down
From the savage grip of the process
This is not some kind of holy vision
Holding back a great dogmatic tide
Rinsed clean of servile derision
Gaining passage to the other side
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6. _ Black Bag Confidential
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7. _ Bobby Baun
When every single thing">" Ive grown to love
Is tied up in this moment
Like a dream from which I pray I'll never wake
Who can wash away these tears
When all I've ever wanted
Is still written on her face
But the wind keeps whipping
And the time keeps ticking away
And it feels like Im not closer
With these miles caught in the way
Can anything be salvaged from this wreck?
With forever lying in peices
And her name tacked on my neck
Still caught up in what I wouldnt give
So stubborn and withdrawn
Exposed as though I'd never had a choice
Will things ever be the way they were
Blue skies and Open hearts
Talking up till dawn and reading Joyce
But now its clear
That theres nothing left to retrieve
And precious little that I can believe in
And I was just too blind to see it
So whats it all for?
When the lies mean so much more
Much more than reality
And whats the use of keeping score
When I've lost?
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8. _ Remember Me
Like the light from a dying ember
A familiar melody
Another gift returned to sender
Such a bittersweet memory
I thought I'd finally broken even
But I was never in the game
Sometimes a fool will beleive he's sated
But still the fear remains
I hope youve get everything you wished for
And that all your dreams come to be
But still its painful to know your happy
So far away from me
I can offer no real competition
To the city lights so brights
But do you still remember me
Inside your dreams each night?
I was the one
and you doubts
Will follow you everywhere you run
Close your eyes
You'll never be free
Never undone
And I'm still the one you knew
In spite of all my faults
Theres a part of me thats lost
Torn away from you
And now theres a silence by my side
I can feel myself unwind
But in the back of your mind
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9. _ Made To Be Broken
I spilled a drop of blood and drenched my soul
I pulled my skin through the wire
Spat out the broken prose
And when the curtain close
I'll be behind you with a knife at your back
And I'll fight your hate
With whats in my head
And whats inside my heart
I'll never relate to the things that you've said
Just stopped to fantasize
About the bluest eyes
And a certain smile
That'll rip your soul to peices
Come quick and cauterize this wide open wound
Then give me something for the bleeding
And I'll fight this fate
With whats in my head
And whats inside my heart
I'll never relate to things that you said
I wont shut my eyes till it all just goes away
And I dont know I can make it through another day
When it started it was just a little lie
We kept that burning questions
Deep, deep down inside
Now we're older and our time is running down
Can we still make it right
Somehow the second time around
We dont believe the lies that they've told us
Yea the second time around
Returning to the scence of the crime yeah
Just for one more time around
Skipped over and chastised
'Cause we're never just like you
Misunderstood right from the start
Wore all your cheap abuse like battle scars
Like men from mars to you
And now you're terrified
When you see what we've become
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10. _ Up The Affiliates
The cities lay plundered
The dusk rattles thick with crimes
Of Violent minds
Defeated, Repeated
We're told its a sign on the times
But we know why
Media lies disguised as the truth
one more time
and spinning right out of control
to alter the choice we make
and our view of the world
We've got to stop before its too late
So often lost in the overage
The silent will soon dissappear
Worse every year
Kept pinned to the margins
By misinformation and fear
and we know why
Still strident
yet seeming to suffer alone
Why cant we see that
through out blind consumption
we condone
systems which train free men
to feel true powerless
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11. _ There's No "I" In Team
I can still remember times
Of prosperity while staring clear eyed
With broad strokes of promise
We coloured highlights of our future and
something we'll never get
Until we look back with sincere regret
Is our american dream subject to
collapse beneath their density
And we'll break before we bend
With tomorrow as yet undetermined
You can write your congressmen
And take your grievences to the highest level
To achieve a common end
To serve the bourgeois, the laissez-faire
Citizens duty-bound so we play our part
If you kill the brain
Then you'll stop the heart
And we foster the illusion of a
Democratic archetype
Can we forge hope from this devastation
And bring about participation
To stem the apathetic tide
Now poised to wash us all away
And we break before we bend
With tomorrow as yet undetermined
We achieve such selfish ends
'Till we concern ourselves with the plight of others
you can write your congressmen
And fucking spit in the wind
For all the good it'll do you friend
We havent got the luxury
Of neutral oberservation
'Cause when its said and done
We stand or fall as one
And though the situations grave
I think its worth the risk to save
This notion of the free
And the asylum of the brave
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12. _ Jesus Loves the Westside
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13. _ The Dubious Glow Of Excess
Here we stand arm in arm
at the corridors of time and reason
with jaws set
Our collective gaze unflinching
Under the eyes of gods, men, martyrs and saints
And what if all your hopes and dreams came true
tomorrow
would you lie
Basking in the dubious glow of excess
Forsaking all other
Life alone with a broken promise
These thoughts wont pray away
Stand still stone cold and empty
Begging grace to favor this soul
One more day
Im struck blind
With it all
Ive never been the kind to say im sorry
Its strange
To hear the dead keep calling
How many restless days and nights will pass
As the salience of all your broken reveries
Hammers upon your consciousness
and will tomorrow bring anything
save the vacant reproach
of your pensive ministrations
Run out the pain of indifference and avarice
All the small towns and cigarettes
Ive seen much more than I wished for
Watched our surface calling in all his debts
So once again we stand staring into the sable horizon
our jaws set
Collective gaze unflinching
Under the eyes of gods, men, martyrs and saints
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14. _ Paean To The Enlightenment
My line falls out tempting providence
One more dime spent on the fence
As you mourn the wretch of innocence lost
True lies and surrogates
Room, board and benefits
Boardrooms make breeding grounds
For selfish bastards anyhow
And the grace that we really live for
Are the sacrifices made
Protracted and betrayed
Enough to suffer
How many rats will tip the scales
Of failing finance
How many brave and able men will be lost at sea
Who dares to complicate
and the retaliate
Renouncing tolerance of everything they see
Follow like sheep
a face in the crowd
a good team player
give me blood
give me truth
Its what we came for
The frayed myth of enlightenment
Is a supposition
If you believe
Smith wrote anything but fiction
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15. _ More DePalma, Less Fellini
Here I am drunk at 3 AM
Got my second bottle down
I got 12 to 15 pages
of my desperation
Cold I feel so poor and old
And I'm maddened for your flesh
But my bodys broken down
In the fading twilight
I will find a way
Im gonna find a way
While the fear of wasted years
Keeps laughing just behind
Alone no one will stay with me
No an angel of despair
To watch me as I rot
And the radio keeps playing
Down for days I make no sound
Soon the rats and carrion
Will rip the flesh away
From legs and wrists and head
I make promises that I'd never describe
This sense of waiting out the end
So pour another glass
And one more virgin page
just might get lucky
And maybe I'll get good
at 3am
So here I am
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