1. _ Progress?
Frank zappa (guitar, vocals)
Ian underwood (alto saxophone, piano)
Bunk gardner (tenor saxophone, clarinet)
Motorhead sherwood (baritone saxophone, tambourine)
Roy estrada (bass, vocals)
Don preston (electric piano)
Arthur tripp (drums, percussion)
Jimmy carl black (drums)
Members of the bbc symphony orchestra
(the trio protests the interruption, to which don responds that performance of diatonic music (and eating meat) will preclude them from seeing his aura. they argue that diatonic music is good an
Electronic music is horse-shit. he argues that diatonic music is too old-fashioned, and that there must be growth! you've got to eat macrobiotic food -- and study astrology! (it is worth noting
, although the plot was my idea, each band member was responsible for generating his own dialog.)
(?):
Hold it! hold it!
(?):
Hey, put that down.
Don:
Silence you fools, don't you believe in progress?
Bunk:
Take that progress and stick it under a rock.
Don:
We must overthrow the diatonic system.
Fz:
Yes
Ian:
Bullshit.
Don:
We're coming to the beginning of a new era wherein the development of the inner self will be the most important factor.
Ian:
Honey your music is full of shit and besides that it ain't disciplined.
Bunk:
Give me four-four.
Art:
Togetherness.
Ian:
Yeah.
Bunk:
Some old melodies.
Don:
Look, playing that kind of music and eating meat will never, you'll never be able to see my aura then.
Art:
I've seen your aura a lot, i think it stinks.
Ian:
You've been drinking, don?
Art:
I can hear your aura and it's bad man.
Don:
Listen, there are many strange things that science doesn't know.
Bunk:
Discipline, you need discipline. four, four.
Don:
It's got to be new, it's got to progress, it's got to evolve. there must be growth!
(?):
Ah, man.
Don:
You've got to eat macrobiotic food.
Fz:
We're doing a play.
Don:
And study astrology. delve into the occult world.
Ian:
Well you can delve all you want but were formin' a new group go and do you some yoga excercises. take care of business.
Don:
Look, mark my words... if you continue playing this music something strange may happen.
Bunk:
Don't threaten me...
Fz:
By the end of the first show...
Don:
By the end of the first show... no the second show.
Fz:
So at this point in the development of our plot the three talented members of the mothers of invention have quit the group to form their own band with a lot of discipline.
(?):
Yeah.
Fz:
Listen what we need is a nice disciplined combo!
(this causes the talented trio to quit the mothers, in order to form their own band with a lot of discipline. suddenly, through the magic of stage-craft, their new, disciplined combo (14 members
He bbc symphony) marches on stage, wearing tuxedos, with robot-looking designs painted on their faces. ian, bunk and art put on tuxes, get some bolts and widgits painted on their faces by a rovi
Ke-up artist, and take up performance positions within the bbc ensemble.)
Fz:
And so that they would be completely tackished and fit in with the rest of the disciplined combo. the former members of the mothers of invention receive their initiation into the robot musical w
Don:
This makes me nervous i'm gonna go do some yoga.
Ian:
Yeah you better.
Fz:
Meanwhile dom de wild under pressure prepares to unwind with some healthy yoga excercises.
(at this point, motorhead wanders out, piddling with his tambourine. he sees the bbc disciplined combo, covets their uniforms, and demands to join their group. the ensemble rebukes him because h
't read music. in spite of this, he plans to force his way in.)
Fz:
This is euclid motorhead sherwood.
(?):
What's the matter with him?
Ian:
He's nervous cause he couldnt play with our new group.
Motorhead:
Oh, that's nice, look at those suits.
Fz:
Motorhead covets the uniforms of the other band. and also shows some interest in the bum of underwood.
Ian:
Ayyyy
(?):
Ten years ago i knew a lot of guys down in switzerland.
Motorhead:
Hey can i play in your band with a suit like that too?
(?):
No!
Motorhead:
But i like the suits and i can play good. i can play . . . play anything.
Fz:
Motorhead is lying. he can't play good, he can't play anything. he's trying to con his way into the other band. he knows they don't want him.
Motorhead:
But i got practicing and play good.
Fz:
He's lying. he hasn't been practicing, he doesn't do shit.
Ian:
Ask me you couldn't even count to four.
(?):
Come on beat it man.
Motorhead:
You can't do that to me i'll fix you. i get into your band.
(?):
Okay motorhead, just get out of the way.
Motorhead:
You can't stop me, i'll get in there somehow.
Fz:
Motorhead explains to the members of the robot combo that nothing can stop him he will join their group whether they like it or not.
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2. _ Prologue
Frank zappa (guitar, synclavier)
Steve vai (guitar)
Ray white (guitar, vocals)
Tommy mars (keyboards)
Chuck wild (piano)
Arthur barrow (bass)
Scott thunes (bass)
Jay anderson (string bass)
Ed mann (percussion)
Chad wackerman (drums)
Ike willis (vocals)
Terry bozzio (vocals)
Dale bozzio (vocals)
Napoleon murphy brock (vocals)
Bob harris (vocals)
Johnny "guitar" watson (vocals)
Thing-fish:
Once upon a time, musta been 'round october, few years back, in one o' dose top secret lab-motories de gubbnint keep stashed away underneath virginia, an evil prince, occasion'ly employed as a p
Ime theatrical criticizer set to woikin' on a plot fo de systematic genocidical remove'lance of all unwanted highly-rhythmic individj'lls an' sissy-boys!
De cocksucker done whiffed up a secret potium... an' right 'long wid it, de atrocious idea dat what he been boilin' up down deahhhh jes' mights be de final solutium to de white main's 'boidennn'
Yo' acquire my drift...
Well, he were sure he had a good thing goin'... but, dere was always de possobility dat somethin' might fuck up, so, he planned to have a little test, jes' to check it all out befo' he dump't it
E wattuh supply.
Sho'tly denafter, wit high-level gubnint co-robberatium, he arranged to have a good-will visit to san quentim, 'long wit some country-westin mu- zishnin's, 'n sprinkle a little bit of it on some
E boys in deahhh (since dey done used a few of 'em befo' when dey was messin' wit de zyph'liss).
So, heah dey come wit de potium, dump'nit all in de mash potatoes!
Den dey wen' up to de warden's office fo' some hot toddy, watchin' a little football while dey's waitin' to see what gone happen!
Fact o' de matter were: nothin' happened, so dey went off'n dribbled it in a special shipnint of galoot co-log-nuh dat went out 'bouts november!
Next thing y'know, fagnits be droppin' off like flies...'long wit a large number of severely-tanned individj'lls, pre-zumnably of hay'chen extrakment!
But not de boys in de rest home! oh no! mixin' de shit wit de mash potatoes done smoothed it out a little, so's it wouldn't kill yo' ass, but, it sho' would make y'ugly! 'n ef y'was already ugly
D make yo ass mean 'n ugly...'n ef you was already mean 'n ugly, it'd turn ya into a strange, unknown kreetchuh, never befo' seen on broadway!^lthass right! it'd turn ya' into a 'mammy nun'! hea
E a potato...lips like a duck...big ol' hands, puffin' up! big ones! science! me-jev'l re-lij-mus costumery all over yo' body! yow! oh yeah! mmmm-hmmm!
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3. _ Pound For A Brown
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4. _ The Orange County Lumber Truck
Frank zappa (lead guitar)
Ian underwood (alto saxophone)
Bunk gardner (tenor saxophone)
Motorhead sherwood (baritone saxophone, snorks)
Buzz gardner (trumpet, flugel horn)
Roy estrada (bass)
Jimmy carl black (drums)
Arthur tripp (drums)
Don preston (piano, organ, electronic effects)
Don "sugar cane" harris (electric violin)
Lowell george (rhythm guitar, vocals)
And in your dreams
You can see yourself
As a prophet
Saving the world
The words from your lips ...
I just can't believe you are
Such a fool
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5. _ Oh No
Frank zappa (lead guitar)
Ian underwood (alto saxophone)
Bunk gardner (tenor saxophone)
Motorhead sherwood (baritone saxophone, snorks)
Buzz gardner (trumpet, flugel horn)
Roy estrada (bass)
Jimmy carl black (drums)
Arthur tripp (drums)
Don preston (piano, organ, electronic effects)
Don "sugar cane" harris (electric violin)
Lowell george (rhythm guitar, vocals)
Ray collins (vocals)
Oh no
I don't believe it
You say that you think you know
The meaning of love
You say love is all we need
You say
With your love you can change
All of the fools
All of the hate
I think you're probably
Out to lunch
Oh no
I don't believe it
You say that you think you know
The meaning of love
Do you really think it can be told?
You say that you really know
I think
You should check it again
How can you say
What you believe
Will be the key to a
World of love?
All your love -
Will it save me?
All your love -
Will it save the world
From what we can't understand
Oh no
I don't believe it
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6. _ Agency Man
Frank zappa (guitar, vocals)
Ian underwood (alto saxophone, piano)
Bunk gardner (tenor saxophone, clarinet)
Motorhead sherwood (baritone saxophone, tambourine)
Roy estrada (bass, vocals)
Don preston (electric piano)
Arthur tripp (drums, percussion)
Jimmy carl black (drums)
Members of the bbc symphony orchestra
(were the mothers of invention ahead of their time? at least in the case of agency man (written in 1967), about ronald reagan running for president. (since bill casey was reagan campaign manager
Later became head of the cia, the idea of a political sales pitch emanating from an agency man takes on a whole new dimension).
Sell us a president, agency man
Smiling big brother stern father perhaps
Sell us a president, agency man
(a gay?) smiling up we know never craps
Let's try california,
Pay us first before we do it
We get a smilin nazi
March him right on through
Wham a baby
Kiss a baby
Ladies in for tea
And here's a bunch of speeches
Well toss 'em in for free
Sell us a president, agency man
Smiling big brother stern father perhaps
Sell us a president, agency man
(a gay?) smiling up we know never craps
We'll sell him in the movies
On the tube throughout the year
We'll sell him by the bucket
To the okies drinking beer
We'll teach him how to walk and talk
We'll putty up his chin
We'll print his picture everywhere
Of course the shmuck will win
From the heart of death valley
To the ruling of our land
A simple trick you simple pig
It's just the way we planned
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7. _ Jimmy Carl Black Philosophy Lesson
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8. _ Epilogue
Frank zappa (guitar, vocals)
Ian underwood (alto saxophone, piano)
Bunk gardner (tenor saxophone, clarinet)
Motorhead sherwood (baritone saxophone, tambourine)
Roy estrada (bass, vocals)
Don preston (electric piano)
Arthur tripp (drums, percussion)
Jimmy carl black (drums)
Members of the bbc symphony orchestra
(jimmy carl, motorhead, roy & bunk are reunited by dons sentimental stylings. they dance and hug each other, forming a chorus line for backing vocals, while ian lies in a crumpled heat at th
E of the stage. on the downbeat of the epilogue, ian miraculously returns to life, strangles don, and hurls him down a flight of steps, regains control of the steinway and finishes out the show
The orchestra.)
(instrumental)
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9. _ Prologue (Bogus Pomp)
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10. _ Rejected Mexican Pope Leaves the Stage
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11. _ Orange County Lumber Truck, Pt. 1
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12. _ The Jimmy Carl Black Philosophy Lesson
Frank zappa (guitar, vocals)
Ian underwood (alto saxophone, piano)
Bunk gardner (tenor saxophone, clarinet)
Motorhead sherwood (baritone saxophone, tambourine)
Roy estrada (bass, vocals)
Don preston (electric piano)
Arthur tripp (drums, percussion)
Jimmy carl black (drums)
Members of the bbc symphony orchestra
(next during the jimmy carl black philosophy lesson we learn that if you wanna get laid after the show, you gotta play rock n roll music an drink beer -- you're not gonna get laid anyway with th
Niforms on! he announces his intention to quit the mothers, planning to make his way into the audience in order to hustle some young ladies. it was my unfortunate duty to remind him that here in
On, your'e not gonna get any pussy unless you like a pop star --. the make-up team dresses him up to look like a cross between donovan and jimi hendrix. with a bottle of beer (double diamond) in
Hand he charges into the audience.)
Fz:
At this very moment jimmy carl black the indian of the group is approaching the stage. jimmy carl likes to drink and also likes to boogie all night long and is also horny. approaches underwood i
Transformed state at the piano and ask him this all important question:
Jimmy carl:
Hey i thought we're gonna play a rock & roll concert. what is this?
Ian:
Jimmy carl black indian of the group? four fours.
Jimmy carl:
How are you gonna get laid if you dont play rock & roll & drink beer. you get laid after the concert if you play rock & roll, this kind of crap you're not gonna . . .
Ian:
You're not gonna get laid anyway with that uniform on.
Jimmy carl:
I'll tell you what i'm gonna do. i'm gonna quit i'm gonna out and hustle me some chick, the hell with you. i'm leaving the group.
(?):
Jimmy you need some discipline
Fz:
Jimmy carl(?) for your own good, that here in london you're not gonna get any pussy unless you look like a popstar. fix him up! mod jacket, a thrilly mod neckpiece, jimmy hendrix wig, and a feat
Oa.
Jimmy carl:
Waaaaaaaaaaa
Fz:
Jimmy carl black enters the audience to hustle some young ladies. go on jim see if you can get any action, and if you get lucky fix us up too. and if you're really lucky, get something for the r
... mmmm the little mechanical things are going up and down, up and down.
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13. _ Transylvania Boogie
Frank zappa (guitar)
Ian underwood (organ)
Max bennet (bass)
Aynsley dunbar (drums)
(instrumental)
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14. _ King Kong
Frank zappa (lead guitar, vocals)
Mark volman (vocals)
Howard kaylan (vocals)
Jim pons (bass, vocals)
Don preston (keyboards, electronics)
Ian underwood (keyboards, alto saxophone)
Aynsley dunbar (drums)
Aaaah...
Bidet!
Bloooow-job?
Bidet!
Jambon
Bloooow-job?
Bidet! bidet! bidet!...
Blow-job! blow-job! blow-job!...
Jambon...jambon... ... thank you
Oh thank you, you're really too kind
Thank you, thank you so much
Thank you, thank you
Blow-job
Help out, ladies and gentlemen
Oui!
I bet: oui, oui
And now for the next part of our program,
I'd like to present, ah...blow-job!
Blow-job! bidet! jambon!...
Jambon...jambon...
Bidet!...
I want a garden!
I want a garden!
I want a garden!
I want a nun!
I want a nun!
I want a burrow in the broad daylight
I want a garden!
I want a nun!
I want a garden!
Just like the garden that that asshole came up here on the stage
And sang about, three years ago...
He came up out of the audience,
He said: "i want a garden!
I want a garden!
I wanna water it with my tears..."
And then denny walley said: "oh, you want kindergarten!"
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15. _ Orange County Lumber Truck, Pt. 2
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16. _ Let's Make The Water Turn Black
Frank zappa (guitar, piano, lead vocals)
Billy mundi (drums, vocals, yak)
Bunk gardner (woodwinds)
Roy estrada (electric bass, vocals)
Don preston (retired)
Jimmy carl black (drums, trumpet, vocals)
Ian underwood (piano, woodwinds)
Motorhead sherwood (soprano, baritone saxophone)
Suzy creamcheese (telephone)
Dick barber (snorks)
Now believe me when i tell you that my song is really true
I want everyone to listen and believe
It's about some little people from a long time ago
And all the things the neighbors didn't know early in the morning daddy dinky went to work
Selling lamps & chairs to san ber'dino squares
And i still remember mama with her apron & her pad
Feeding all the boys at ed's cafe!
Whizzing & pasting & pooting through the day
(ronnie helping kenny helping burn his poots away!)
And all the while on a shelf in the shed:
Kenny's little creatures on display!
Ronnie saves his numies on a window in his room
(a marvel to be seen: dysentery green)
While kenny & his buddies had a game out in the back:
Let's make the water turn black
We see them after school in a world of their own
(to some it might seem creepy what they do...)
The neighbors on the right sat & watched them every night
(i bet you'd do the same if they was you)
Whizzing & pasting & pooting through the day
(ronnie helping kenny helping burn his poots away!)
And all the while on a shelf in the shed:
Kenny's little creatures on display!
Ronnie's in the army now & kenny's taking pills
Oh! how they yearn to see a bomber burn!
Color flashing, thunder crashing, dynamite machine!
(wait till the fire turns green...
Wait till the fire turns green)
Wait till the fire turns green
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17. _ The Rejected Mexican Pope Leaves The Stage
Frank zappa (guitar, vocals)
Ian underwood (alto saxophone, piano)
Bunk gardner (tenor saxophone, clarinet)
Motorhead sherwood (baritone saxophone, tambourine)
Roy estrada (bass, vocals)
Don preston (electric piano)
Arthur tripp (drums, percussion)
Jimmy carl black (drums)
Members of the bbc symphony orchestra
(ian lets him try out. his selected aria:
Holiday in berlin (we had just played there a few weeks before, and experienced a riot ). as he finishes, the robot combo boos him. at this point, the rejected mexican pope leaves the stage.)
Fz:
The rejected mexican pope leaves the stage.
All:
One two three four
(the robots play again and motorhead, who has completed his disguise attempts to join them, interrupting with a psychotic soprano sax cadenza. the robots blow him away with several ugly chords.
Ng solace with the church he approaches the rejected mexican pope for consolation. the rejected mexican pope responds by attempting anal intercourse. meanwhile...)
Fz:
Undaunted, the band plays on
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18. _ Harry, You're A Beast
Frank zappa (guitar, piano, lead vocals)
Billy mundi (drums, vocals, yak)
Bunk gardner (woodwinds)
Roy estrada (electric bass, vocals)
Don preston (retired)
Jimmy carl black (drums, trumpet, vocals)
Ian underwood (piano, woodwinds)
Motorhead sherwood (soprano, baritone saxophone)
Suzy creamcheese (telephone)
Dick barber (snorks)
I'm gonna tell you the way it is
And i'm not gonna be kind or easy
Your whole attitude stinks, i say
And the life you lead is completely empty
You paint your head
Your mind is dead
You don't even know what i just said
That's you: american
Womanhood!
You're phony on top
Phony underneath
You lay in bed & grit your teeth
Madge, i want your body!
Harry, get back!
Madge, it's not merely
Physical!
Harry, you're a beast!
Censored censored censored
Censored censored censored
Madge... i couldn't help it
...i... doggone it!
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19. _ Holiday In Berlin
Frank zappa (guitar, vocals)
Ian underwood (alto saxophone, piano)
Bunk gardner (tenor saxophone, clarinet)
Motorhead sherwood (baritone saxophone, tambourine)
Roy estrada (bass, vocals)
Don preston (electric piano)
Arthur tripp (drums, percussion)
Jimmy carl black (drums)
Members of the bbc symphony orchestra
(roy sings melody)
All:
Boooooh
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20. _ Like It Or Not
Frank zappa (guitar, vocals)
Ian underwood (alto saxophone, piano)
Bunk gardner (tenor saxophone, clarinet)
Motorhead sherwood (baritone saxophone, tambourine)
Roy estrada (bass, vocals)
Don preston (electric piano)
Arthur tripp (drums, percussion)
Jimmy carl black (drums)
Members of the bbc symphony orchestra
(while the orchestra plays like it or not, motorhead rummages on stage through a pile of musical instrument cases, magically locating a rumpled tuxedo of his own, along with enough grease paint
Ansform himself into a shabby replica of a robot combo member.)
(instrumental)
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21. _ Undaunted, The Band Plays On
Frank zappa (guitar, vocals)
Ian underwood (alto saxophone, piano)
Bunk gardner (tenor saxophone, clarinet)
Motorhead sherwood (baritone saxophone, tambourine)
Roy estrada (bass, vocals)
Don preston (electric piano)
Arthur tripp (drums, percussion)
Jimmy carl black (drums)
Members of the bbc symphony orchestra
(during this musical section, don preston, chemically altered via macrobiotic snack consumption, is transformed into a phantom of the opera-like monster. while members of the robot combo hiss an
Him, he sneaks around behind the stage set-up, planning a terrible revenge for the rejection of his electronic music. he pounces on the unsuspecting underwood in the midst of his rapturous pian
O, strangles him, throws him to the floor, and takes his place on the bench. the final revenge? he spews forth a morbidly diatonic piece, entitled sell us a president, agency man.)
Fz:
Meanwhile (the snack?) enters the mind of dom dewild.
All:
One two three four
(?):
It's the macro-biotic food.
Fz:
While the well disciplined ian underwood plays his piano solo. dom de wild, transformed, begins to sneak up on him.
All:
Booos
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22. _ Sleeping In A Jar
Frank zappa (guitar, vocals, percussion)
Ray collins (vocals)
Jimmy carl black (drums)
Roy estrada (electric bass)
Don preston (electric piano)
Billy mundi (drums)
Bunk gardner (piccolo, flute, clarinet, bass clarinet, soprano saxophone, alto saxophone, tenor saxophone, bassoon)
Ian underwood (electric organ, piano, harpsichord, celeste, flute, clarinet, alto saxophone, baritone saxophone)
Arthur tripp (drums, timpani, vibes, marimba, xylophone, wood blocks, bells, small chimes)
Motorhead sherwood (tenor saxophone, tambourine)
Ruth komanoff (marimba, vibes)
It's the middle of the night
And your mommy & your daddy are sleeping
It's the middle of the night
And your mommy & your daddy are sleeping
It's the middle of the night
And your mommy & your daddy are sleeping
Sleeping
Mom & dad are sleeping
Sleeping in a jar...
( the jar is under the bed)
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23. _ Help, I'm A Rock
Ray collins (lead vocals, harmonica, tambourine, finger cymbals, bobby pin, tweezers)
Jimmy carl black (drums)
Roy estrada (bass, guitarron, boy soprano)
Elliot ingber (lead guitar, rhythm guitar)
Help i'm a rock, help i'm a rock, help i'm a rock!
Ahahahahahahaaa
Help i'm a rock, help i'm a rock, help i'm a rock!
Somebody, please, please!
Help i'm a rock, help i'm a rock...
Wow man, it's a drag being a rock
Help i'm a rock...
I wish i was anything but a rock
Heck, i'd even like to be a policeman
Hey, you know what, you know maybe if i practised, you know
Maybe if i passed my driving test
I could get a gig drivin' that bus and pick some freaks up
In front of ben franks, right!
Help i'm a cop, help i'm a cop, help i'm a cop!
(help i'm a rock...), help i'm a cop, help i'm a cop!
It's a drag being a cop, i think i'd rather be the mayor
Always wondered what i was gonna be when i grew up, you know
Always wondered whether or not, whether or not i could make it,
You know, in society, because,
You know, it's a drag when you're rejected
So i tore the cover off a book of matches and i sent in
And i got this letter back that said, uhu, aha
It can't happen here
It can't happen here
I'm telling you, my dear
That it can't happen here
Because i been checkin' it out, baby
I checked it out a couple a times, hmmmmmmmm
And i'm telling you
It can't happen here
Oh darling, it's important that you believe me
(bop bop bop bop)
That it can't happen here
Who could imagine that they would freak out somewhere in kansas...
Kansas kansas tototototodo
Kansas kansas tototototodo
Kansas kansas
Who could imagine that they would freak out in minnesota...
Mimimimimimimi minnesota, minnesota, minnesota
Who could imagine...
Who could imagine
That they would freak out in washington, d.c.
D.c. d.c. d.c. d.c. d.c.
It can't happen here
Ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba
It can't happen here
It can't happen here
Everybody's safe and it can't happen here
No freaks for us
It can't happen here
Everybody's clean and it can't happen here
No, no, it won't happen here
I'm telling you it can't
It won't happen here
(bop bop didi bop didi bop bop bop)
Plastic folks, you know
It won't happen here
You're safe, mama
You're safe, baby
You just cook a tv dinner
And you make it
(bop bop bop)
No no no no
Oh, we're gonna get a tv dinner and cook it up
Go get a tv dinner and cook it up
Cook it up
Oh, and it won't happen here
(no no no no no no no no no no no
Man you guys are really safe
Everything's cool).
Who could imagine
Who could imagine
That they would freak out in the suburbs!
I remember (tu-tu)
I remember (tu-tu)
I remember (tu-tu)
They had a swimming pool
I remember (tu-tu)
I remember (tu-tu)
They had a swimming pool
I remember (tu-tu)
I remember (tu-tu)
They had a swimming pool.
And they thought it couldn't happen here
(duh duh duh duh duh)
They knew it couldn't happen here
They were so sure it couldn't happen here
But...
Suzie...
Yes yes yes--i've always felt that
Yes i agree man, it really makes it...yeah...
It's a real thing, man
And it really makes it
(makes it)
Suzie, you just got to town,
And we've been, we've been very interested
In your development.
Forget it!
Hmmmmmmmmm
(it can't happen here)
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24. _ Holding The Group Back
Frank zappa (guitar, vocals)
Ian underwood (alto saxophone, piano)
Bunk gardner (tenor saxophone, clarinet)
Motorhead sherwood (baritone saxophone, tambourine)
Roy estrada (bass, vocals)
Don preston (electric piano)
Arthur tripp (drums, percussion)
Jimmy carl black (drums)
Members of the bbc symphony orchestra
(just a few weeks before this show, the pope had announced a ban on birth control pills (in spite of the persistent rumors that the vatican had major financial holdings in a swiss company that m
Ctured the little devils). to commemorate this, roy estrada strides on stage wearing a floor length chain-mail dress with enormous aluminum tits, and an ornate catholic ceremonial head-dress. he
Arrying a childs plastic sand bucket filled with smartys (the british equivalent of m&ms). the inscription on the bucket reads no more ugly babies! while chanting in latin, he hurls fistfuls
Andy into the audience, in lieu of birth control pills.
He approaches ian in his robotically transformed state and begs for an audition as an opera singer with ians new group, claiming that he has to leave the mothers -- he's holding the group back b
E he's a mexican (he actually used to think this was true, and told me so on several occasions.)
Fz:
Then from out of the corner from the stage comes roy ralph estrada perturbed at the present situation within the mothers.
Roy estrada:
Domino domino vo-bisqu-u-u-um
Domino vo-bisqu-u-u-um
Amen
Domino vo-bisqum
Hallelujah
Et cum spiritu tuo
Ian, i dont think i qualify for the mothers
Fz:
They're making up their lines as they go along isn't it thrilling?
Ian:
Why, roy?
Roy:
Because i don't think i'm qualified. i think i'm holding the group back because i'm a mexican, and also because i don't play bass good.
Ian:
I don't care how you can play bass but we have no mexicans in this group.
Roy:
And i wanna join your group.
Ian:
No mexicans!
Roy:
I can sing opera, i cut my hair, i got all my shit together here. i can do it.
Ian:
I don't care how you look you gotta be able to cut the part.
Roy:
I can sing, please, please, give me a chance.
Ian:
I don't believe you can sing.
Roy:
Please, please hear my plea, please ian please, i can do it, give me a chance. please, please. oh, oh, oh, please.
Ian:
Okay mexican, okay mexican, sing this note.
Roy:
You think everything is gonna be alright.
Ian:
Okay you passed the first part of the audition now you gotta sing. roy:
Mi, mi, mi, mi, mi
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