The Legendary C.w. Mccall

(bill fries, chip davis)

Well, interstate 80, we was cuttin' the fog
Just me an' old sloan (old sloan's my dog)
We had an eighteen-wheeler with ten on the floor and stereo layin' a strip
Now we spied a sign, says "eat gas now"
We decided to whip in and pick up some chow
At the old home filler-up an' keep on a-truckin' cafe

[chorus]
Oh, the old home filler-up an' keep on a-truckin'
Oh, the old home filler-up an' keep on a-truckin' (a-lookin' for mavis)
Oh, the old home filler-up an' keep on a-truckin' cafe

Now we've been every place between here and south sioux
And we've seen us a truck-stop waitress or two
But this gal's built like a burlap bag full of bobcats:
She's got it to-gether

Well, she filled my tank; i said "thank you, honey."
Her name was mavis, i gave her the money
Old sloan just set there, watchin' and waggin' and wishin'.
I says, "you wait in the truck, boy."

Then i went inside. she says, "what'll it be?"
I says "a cup of your best and a number three."
She come back with an order to go and a quart of hot c and a bone for sloan.
I said, "much obliged"; old sloan gave a bark
I left her a buck and he left his heart
At the old home filler-up an' keep on a-truckin' cafe

[chorus]
Oh, the old home filler-up an' keep on a-truckin'
Oh, the old home filler-up an' keep on a-truckin'
Oh, the old home filler-up an' keep on a-truckin' cafe

Well, saturday night we was truckin' along
Yeah, me and old sloan was a-gettin' it on
I said, "sloan, i've been thinkin' on a-gettin' up my courage, and tonight's the night"
Well, i popped the clutch, gave the tranny a spin
Took the beebeetown ramp and slid on in
To the old home filler-up an' keep on a-truckin' cafe

[chorus]
Oh, the old home filler-up an' keep on a-truckin'
Oh, the old home filler-up an' keep on a-truckin' (it never closes)
Oh, the old home filler-up an' keep on a-truckin' cafe

Well, i got me a stool, took a load off my shoes,
Made mavis an offer that she couldn't refuse
I says, "how'd ya like to go for a ride with me and old sloan? i just had my truck warshed."
She allowed as how it sounded like a whole lot of fun
But we was gonna have ta wait until the dishes was done
And was it all right with me if she brought along her mother as a chaperone?
I said, "why not?"

Well, we geared that tranny into super-low
And the four of us went to see a picture show
Yeah, i took 'em to the drive-in the-a-ter over by pisgah, to see true grit
Saw the late, late show; old sloan hit the sack
And then along about two o'clock i hauled 'em all back
To the old home filler-up an' keep on a-truckin' cafe

[chorus]
Oh, the old home filler-up an' keep on a-truckin'
Oh, the old home filler-up an' keep on a-truckin'
Oh, the old home filler-up an' keep on a-truckin' cafe (eight stools and a promise)
Oh, the old home filler-up an' keep on a-truckin'
Oh, the old home filler-up an' keep on a-truckin'
Oh, the old home filler-up an' keep on a-truckin' cafe (they got a real nice place there)

(c.w. mccall, bill fries, chip davis)

Bill fries says that this is based on a true story from the late '60s, when a band of hippies rolled into telluride and decided to stay.

One day about four or five years ago
We is settin' at the conoco station
Kickin' tires, and swattin' flies,
And discussin' the state of the union
When right out in front of the baptist church
Come a big ol' purple school bus
Had astrological signs upon it
And thirty-five hippies and dogs inside
About half of 'em went for the courthouse lawn
And them dogs commenced on the fireplug
Rest of 'em set there starin' at us
And i says, "roy, go get your flit gun"
He says, "which is the hippies? and which is the dogs?"
I says, "beats the hell outta me, roy."
What they was, was a bunch a' them crispy critters
And their leader was a space cadet

He says, "sagittarius, we has arrived.
"prepare to disembark, men.
"get the incense goin' and the sitar out
"we gonna camp in the city park, man."

I says, "boys, let me explain the situation to ya.
"a: you're gettin' me down
"and b: we got us a leash law here
"and c: you in the wrong town.
"you drop one string a' beads in that there park
"and you gonna see a whole lotta stars.
"you got fifteen seconds to get out of town, boys,
"or we gonna blow ya ta mars."

Well, they all got back in the purple bus
And proceeded to the city limits.
Then the telephone rang, was the swimmin' pool
Says a mess a' wild critters was in it!
So we all got in the marshal's plymouth
(which is always at the conoco station)
Went flashin' on down to the swimmin' pool
To give them critters a citation

By the time we arrived, it was too damn late
Them critters is all had their pants down
Them dogs was tearin' the bathhouse apart,
And they's after the fish in the fish pond!
I says, "roy, you get the one in the silver t-shirt
"and i'll get the rest with a net.
"we gonna have a jail full a' naked crispy critters
"and a drip-dry space cadet."

[you've watched the dukes of hazzard, haven't you? c'mon, admit it; nobody's looking. well, at this point in the song there's a short interlude which resembles a car chase on dukes. there's banj
Kin' and yee-hawin' and a general sense of raucous abandon. oh, yeah, and a few dog barks. it's round-up time at the swimmin' pool.]

Well, we gave 'em hell, but we lost the war
'cause them critters outnumbered us
So they moved in and set up camp
And they lived in that purple school bus
Six weeks later, there was nothin' in town
But eighty-four dogs and a head shop
Sellin' dried up weeds, and sunflower seeds,
And astrological postcards

Yeah, critters took over the city council
And the dogs all barked their brains out
And the whole damn town was crispy critters
And the mayor was a space cadet

(c.w. mccall, b. fries, c. davis)

[on the cb]
Ah, breaker one-nine, this here's the rubber duck. you gotta copy on me, pig pen, c'mon? ah, yeah, 10-4, pig pen, fer shure, fer shure. by golly, it's clean clear to flag town, c'mon. yeah, that
Big 10-4 there, pig pen, yeah, we definitely got the front door, good buddy. mercy sakes alive, looks like we got us a convoy...

Was the dark of the moon on the sixth of june
In a kenworth pullin' logs
Cab-over pete with a reefer on
And a jimmy haulin' hogs
We is headin' for bear on i-one-oh
'bout a mile outta shaky town
I says, "pig pen, this here's the rubber duck.
"and i'm about to put the hammer down."

[chorus]
'cause we got a little convoy
Rockin' through the night.
Yeah, we got a little convoy,
Ain't she a beautiful sight?
Come on and join our convoy
Ain't nothin' gonna get in our way.
We gonna roll this truckin' convoy
'cross the u-s-a.
Convoy!


[on the cb]
Ah, breaker, pig pen, this here's the duck. and, you wanna back off them hogs? yeah, 10-4, 'bout five mile or so. ten, roger. them hogs is gettin' in-tense up here.

By the time we got into tulsa town,
We had eighty-five trucks in all.
But they's a roadblock up on the cloverleaf,
And them bears was wall-to-wall.
Yeah, them smokies is thick as bugs on a bumper;
They even had a bear in the air!
I says, "callin' all trucks, this here's the duck.
"we about to go a-huntin' bear."

[chorus]
'cause we got a great big convoy
Rockin' through the night.
Yeah, we got a great big convoy,
Ain't she a beautiful sight?
Come on and join our convoy
Ain't nothin' gonna get in our way.
We gonna roll this truckin' convoy
'cross the u-s-a.
Convoy!


[on the cb]
Ah, you wanna give me a 10-9 on that, pig pen? negatory, pig pen; you're still too close. yeah, them hogs is startin' to close up my sinuses. mercy sakes, you better back off another ten.

Well, we rolled up interstate 44
Like a rocket sled on rails.
We tore up all of our swindle sheets,
And left 'em settin' on the scales.
By the time we hit that chi-town,
Them bears was a-gettin' smart:
They'd brought up some reinforcements
From the illinoise national guard.
There's armored cars, and tanks, and jeeps,
And rigs of ev'ry size.
Yeah, them chicken coops was full'a bears
And choppers filled the skies.
Well, we shot the line and we went for broke
With a thousand screamin' trucks
An' eleven long-haired friends a' jesus
In a chartreuse micra-bus.


[on the cb]
Ah, rubber duck to sodbuster, come over. yeah, 10-4, sodbuster? lissen, you wanna put that micra-bus right behind that suicide jockey? yeah, he's haulin' dynamite, and he needs all the help he c
T.

Well, we laid a strip for the jersey shore
And prepared to cross the line
I could see the bridge was lined with bears
But i didn't have a dog-goned dime.
I says, "pig pen, this here's the rubber duck.
"we just ain't a-gonna pay no toll."
So we crashed the gate doing ninety-eight
I says "let them truckers roll, 10-4."

[chorus]
'cause we got a mighty convoy
Rockin' through the night.
Yeah, we got a mighty convoy,
Ain't she a beautiful sight?
Come on and join our convoy
Ain't nothin' gonna get in our way.
We gonna roll this truckin' convoy
'cross the u-s-a.


Convoy! ah, 10-4, pig pen, what's your twenty?
Convoy! omaha? well, they oughta know what to do with them hogs out there fer shure. well, mercy
Convoy! sakes, good buddy, we gonna back on outta here, so keep the bugs off your glass and the bears off your...
Convoy! tail. we'll catch you on the flip-flop. this here's the rubber duck on the side.
Convoy! we gone. 'bye,'bye.

(there won't be no rock 'n' roll)
(c.w. mccall, bill fries, chip davis)

Well, it's only gonna be about an hour, friend
'til they dam your favorite river
So you can water-ski just one more reservior
And them supersonic ships are gonna take you
'cross a sea of pavement
To one more faceless brickyard on the shore

Yeah, it's only gonna be about an hour or so
'til they rip off all your mountains, boy
And that one last tired old eagle bites the sand
And all of that high-and-mighty scenery's
Gonna be leveled to the ground, boy
By a bunch a' them mindless strip mines on the land

[chorus]
So listen well, my brothers
When you hear the night wind sigh
And you see the wild goose flying
Through the gray, polluted sky
There won't be no country music
There won't be no rock 'n' roll
'cause when they take away our country
They'll take away our soul

Well, it's only gonna take about a minute or so
'til the junkyards fell the prairies, boy
And them smokin' yellow grass fires start to burn
And the warnings on them beer cans
Gonna be buried in them landfills
No deposit, no sad songs, and no returns

Yeah, it's only gonna take about a minute or so
'til the factories blot the sun out
You gonna have to turn your lights on just to see
And them lights are gonna be neon, sayin'
"fly our jets to paradise"
And the whole damn world is gonna be made of styrene

[chorus]
So listen well, my brothers
When you hear the night wind sigh
And you see the wild goose flying
Through the gray, polluted sky
There won't be no country music
There won't be no rock 'n' roll
'cause when they take away our country
They'll take away our soul

Yeah, it's only gonna be about a second, boy
'til they take away all'a this country
And they'll tell you not to listen to this here song
And that far-off sound of freedom's
Gonna be an echo from the past
And the final tune is gonna be sad and long

And it's only gonna be about an eye-blink, boy
'til they pull out the wool to blind us
So we just can't read all the messages on the wall
But the only words that matter
Oughta be scribbled all over them billboards
In big old black and bloody letters, ten feet tall

[chorus]

There won't be no country music
There won't be no rock 'n' roll
'cause when they take away our country
They'll take away our soul

There won't be no country music
There won't be no rock 'n' roll
'cause when they take away our country
They'll take away our soul

There won't be no country music
There won't be no rock 'n' roll
'cause when they take away our country
They'll take away our soul

There won't be no country music
There won't be no rock 'n' roll
'cause when they take away our country
They'll take away our soul
'cause when they take away our country
They'll take away our soul

(c.w. mccall, bill fries, chip davis)

Me an' rj an' the kids was on a camp-out in the mountains, and we had us one'a them u-drive-'em army jeep cars which we rented from a fella by the name of kubozke for thirty bucks a day, buy you
Along the way, take a rabbit's foot and leave a pint of blood for a dee-posit.

And he 'splained it all to us how we was supposed to get to telluride, which is fifty miles away by way of the regular highway, however, there was a shortcut but unless we had drove the black be
Ad before, we'd better be off to stay, stay in bed and sleep late. (pay no attention to the gitar there.)

Well, we took up off'n the highway and we come upon a sign says "black bear road. you don't have to be crazy to drive this road, but it helps." i says, "rj, this must the shortcut
Kubozke was talkin' about." she didn't pay no mind, 'cause she was makin' peanut butter sandwiches for the kids in the back seat throwin' rocks and drinkin' kool-aid and playin' count-the-
Se-plates. but they wasn't havin' too much fun a-countin' license plate or cars, 'cause there weren't no other cars.

We went about a mile-and-a-half in about four hours, busted off the right front fender, tore a hole in the oil pan on a rock as big as a hall closet. went over a bump and spilt the kool-aid and
Ene stuck his bolo knife right through the convertible top and the dog threw up all over the back seat. peanut butter don't agree with him, you see.

So we had to stop and take off the top and air everything out and clean it up. the dog run off and rj says she felt her asthma comin' on. i was sittin' there wonderin' what to do when the en-tir
Nic san joo-wan u-drive-'em army jeep car sank in the mud. at thirteen thousand feet above sea level.

Well, we shoveled it out and ate our lunch, the dog made a yellow hole in the snow and roy gene got out his instamatic and took a snapshot of it. mary elizabeth drawed a picture of the road; it
D like a whole bunch a' zs and ws all strung together. and rj took one look at it and said that the only way that jeep car is goin' down that road is over her dead body. then a rock slipped out
Under the wheel and the u-drive-'em army jeep car went right over the edge of the cliff. yahoo-oo-oo-oo!

"doggone-it, roy gene! how many times do i have to 'splain it to you? when i tell you to put a rock under the wheel, i mean rock! now look at that, what you have there is no bigger'n a grap
T."

(bill fries, chip davis)

Me an' earl was haulin' chickens on a flatbed out of wiggins, and we'd spent all night on the uphill side of thirty-seven miles of hell called wolf creek pass. which is up on the great divide?


We was settin' there suckin' toothpicks, drinkin' nehi and onion soup mix, and i said, "earl, let's mail a card to mother then send them chickens on down the other side. yeah, let's give 'e
Ide."

[chorus]
Wolf creek pass, way up on the great divide
Truckin' on down the other side

Well, earl put down his bottle, mashed his foot down on the throttle, and then a couple'a boobs with a thousand cubes in a nineteen-forty-eight peterbilt screamed to life. we woke up the chicken
R>

Well, we roared up offa that shoulder sprayin' pine cones, rocks, and boulders, and put four hundred head of them rhode island reds and a couple a' burnt-out roosters on the line. look out below
Use here we go!

Well, we commenced to truckin' and them hens commenced to cluckin' and then earl took out a match and scratched his pants and lit up the unused half of a dollar cigar and took a puff. says "
Ain't this purdy up here."

I says, "earl, this hill can spill us. you better slow down or you gonna kill us. just make one mistake and it's the pearly gates for them eight-five crates a' usda-approved cluckers. you w
Hit second?"

[chorus]
Wolf creek pass, way up on the great divide
Truckin' on down the other side

Well, earl grabbed on the shifter and he stabbed her into fifth gear and then the chromium-plated, fully-illuminated genuine accessory shift knob come right off in his hand. i says, "you wa
Crew that thing back on, earl?"

He was tryin' to thread it on there when the fire fell off a' his cigar and dropped on down, sorta rolled around, and then lit in the cuff of earl's pants and burned a hole in his sock. yeah, so
Et him right on fire.

I looked on outta the window and i started countin' phone poles, goin' by at the rate of four to the seventh power. well i put two and two together, and added twelve and carried five; come up wi
Enty-two thousand telephone poles an hour.

I looked at earl and his eyes was wide, his lip was curled, and his leg was fried. and his hand was froze to the wheel like a tongue to a sled in the middle of a blizzard. i says, "earl, i'
The type to complain; but the time has come for me to explain that if you don't apply some brake real soon, they're gonna have to pick us up with a stick and a spoon."

Well, earl rared back, and cocked his leg, stepped as down as hard as he could on the brake, and the pedal went clear to the floor and stayed there, right there on the floor. he said it was sort
E steppin' on a plum.

Well, from there on down it just wasn't real purdy: it was hairpin county and switchback city. one of 'em looked like a can full'a worms; another one looked like malaria germs. right in the midd
The whole damn show was a real nice tunnel, now wouldn't you know?

Sign says clearance to the twelve-foot line, but the chickens was stacked to thirteen-nine. well we shot that tunnel at a hundred-and-ten, like gas through a funnel and eggs through a hen, and w
K that top row of chickens off slicker than scum off a lousiana swamp. went down and around and around and down 'til we run outta ground at the edge of town. bashed into the side of the feed sto
In downtown pagosa springs.

[chorus]
Wolf creek pass, way up on the great divide
Truckin' on down the other side
Wolf creek pass, way up on the great divide
Truckin' on down the other side