Gordon

Words and music by scott dibble, steven page & ed robertson

I didn't ask to be famous, but i'm not sore.
'cause you can see my face in the window of every store.
You can buy my lunch box.
You can wear my clothes.
You can remember my name just as plain as
The face under your nose.

I'm a new kid on the block,
'though i may not be johann sebastian bach.
So we may not write the songs we sing,
But look at elvis, he sold his soul and
You crowned him king.

I didn't ask to be famous, but i'm not sad.
You see, i've got everything that i
Always wished i had.
I thank my manager and i thank the screaming girls,
I thank my hairdresser for giving me such beautiful curls.

Now i'm a new kid on the block,
Well i'm twenty-three and they won't let me grow up.
I went down to register for the draft,
Well i got up to the counter, and the lady there just laughed.

She said you're a new kid on the block,
Young girls scream and old boys mock,
Well you broke my youngest daughter's heart.
I knew you kids were trouble from the start.

I didn't ask to be famous, but i'm not sure
That we're as apple pie as you always thought we were.
I can stay up all night. i can have a blast.
I can breakdance, i can fight, i can kick your sorry ass.

I'm a new kid on the block,
And 'though i may not be johann sebastian back,
There's no need to be afraid of us
'though it just might be your daughter on our bus.

Words & Music by Steven Page

I never thought that you would love me the way that you do.
I never thought that you would love me half as much as I do.
You say you wanna know everything about me. Well here you go.
You say you couldn't live your life without me. I don't know.
But if you want it girl, you've got it,
it's all right here,
in my box set.

I never thought that words like product could ever leave my lips,
but something happened to me somewhere that made me lose my grip.
Maybe it's a lack of inspiration that makes me stoop,
or maybe it's a lack of remuneration; I can't recoup.
But if you want it folks, you got it;
it's all right here in my box set.

Disc One
it's where we've begun, it's all of greatest hits,
and if you are a fan then you know that you've already got 'em.

Disc Two
it was all brand new, al album's worth of songs,
but we had to leave the whole disc blank 'cause
some other label bought 'em.

Disc Three
This is really me in a grade school play;
I had about a hundred thousand lines but of course I forgot 'em.

I never thought there'd be days like this, there was always someone at my door.
I never thought I would ever miss, and the crowd would always holler for more.
But now it seems all that people want is what I used to be,
and every time I try to do something new,
all they want is 1973.

I never thought I'd be regretful of all my past success.
But some stupid number one hit single has go me in this mess.
You can put it on every compilation - that's all right.
You can hear it on the oldies radio station every night.
And if you want it again, you got it
it's right here in my box set.

Disc Four
Never released before, and you can tell why.
it's just some demos I recorded in my basement.

Disc Five
I was barely alive, I was coughing up a lung,
so they had to use a special computer as my replacement.

Disc Six
A dance remix, so I can catch the latest trend
and it'll make you scratch your head and wonder
where my taste went.

So now my fans are crying sellout,
they say that I've lost my touch.
They say I should just get the hell out,
before I do too much.
Hear my songs in an ad for a bathroom cleanser -
they say it's greed,
And now I'm wondering where my friends are in this time of need.
But if you change your mind and buy it,
I hope you enjoy my new box.

I hope you enjoy my new box,
I hope you enjoy my new box set.

Words & Music by Andy Creeggan, Jim Creeggan, Steven Page, Ed Robertson & Tyler Stewart

I found my locker and I found my classes
Lost my lunch and I broke my glasses,
That guy is huge! That girl is wailing!
First day of school and I'm already failing.

This is me in grade nine, baby, this is me in grade nine
This is me in grade nine, baby, this is me in grade nine

I've got a blue and red Adidas bag and a humongous binder,
I'm trying my best not to look like a minor niner.
I went out for the football team to prove that I'm a man
I guess I shouldn't tell them that I like Duran Duran.

This is me in grade nine, baby, this is me in grade nine
This is me in grade nine, baby, this is me in grade nine

Well, half my friends are crazy and the others are depressed
and none of them can help me study for my math test.
I got into the classroom and my knowledge was gone;
I guess I should've studied instead of watching Wrath Of Khan.

This is me in grade nine, baby, this is me in grade nine
This is me in grade nine, baby, this is me in grade nine

They called me chicken legs, they called me four-eyes
they called me fatso, they called me buckwheat,
they called me Eddie

This is me in grade nine, baby, this is me in grade nine
This is me in grade nine, baby, this is me in grade nine

I've got a red leather tie and pair of rugger pants,
I put them on and I went to the high school dance.
Dad said I had to be home by eleven --
aw, man, I'm gonna miss Stairway to Heaven.

This is me in grade nine, baby, this is me in grade nine
This is me in grade nine, baby, this is me in grade nine

Words & Music by Steven Page

The phone rings, it's early, it's seven o'clock.
He says sorry I woke you, but I just had to talk
you know last night, remember when I
tried to choke you?
I didn't mean it, I was drunk, it was only a joke
you should know that by now,
when the chequered flag comes down,
no one no one no one has won the race.

The next night he's over and over and under
and after he's finished she lies there and wonders.
just why does she need him and why does she stay here
and then in the darkness she'll quietly say Dear,
you've never really known that when the white flag
is flown, no one no one no one has won the war.

They're complicated people leading complicated lives,
and he complicates their problems by telling complicated lies
He tells her he's sorry, she tells him it's over,
he tells her he's sorry, she says over and over
You've never really known that when the white flag
is flown, no one no one no one has won the war.

There goes a forest and there goes a bluebird.
There goes a partridge and there goes a Go Train.
There goes an angel and there goes a steeple.
There goes a cop car and there goes an eagle.
There goes a raven and there go the ribbons.
There goes a raven and there go the ribbons.
There goes a raven and there go
The ribbons, the ribbons the ribbons
The ribbons of the flag.

Words by Andy Creeggan, Jim Creeggan, Steven Page & Ed Robertson
Music by Andy Creeggan & Jim Creeggan

Chorus
I love you
And you love me
I love you
So let's make a family tree

I like soup, and I like ice cream sandwiches too.
I like fish sticks, but I love you.
You don't believe me, you say all I think about's myself.
Let me explain, don't walk away.

I love me
You love you
I Love me
So what are we to do?

How would you know that I love you so?
I don't say too much
Why are you blue whenever I'm in town?
I guess life was fine till I came 'round.

You've given me a start, I ain't no doctor
but just take a look at the chart for my heart
like a dart from the start I'm coming
down with something good.
it ain't no fever or flu, doctor says it had
to be someone with brown hair and blue eyes, I'm
lovesick for you I realize.

I's loves you
And youse loves me.
I's loves you
So let's make a family tree.

How did you know that I loved you so?
I don't say too much.
Why are you blue whenever I'm in town?
I guess life was fine till I came 'round.

Chorus

Words by Steven Page & Ed Robertson
Music by Jim Creeggan & Ed Robertson

I concede that you were right about this place.
I can make a perfect likeness of your body if I trace.
I can hold you until you turn out the light
and I can't see

Do you believe that we are all innately good
Do you think that you would love me until tomorrow if you could
Would you please turn down the radio
so we can speak

I put my hands around your neck and you wrap your arms around me.
Put my hands around your neck and you wrap your arms around me.
I put my hands around your neck and you wrap your arms around me.

I regret every time I raised my voice
And it wouldn't be that bright of me to say I had no choice.
I can kiss your eyes your hair your neck
until we forget

I concede that you were right about this place.
I can make a perfect likeness of your body if I trace.
I can hold you until we turn out the light,
and I can't see
I can't see.

Words & Music by Steven Page & Ed Robertson

You know he's not the kind of man who likes to see the world around him
Crumble to a ball around his feet.
So he's always ready, he's always set, he's always well prepared,
he's the most peculiar man you'll ever meet.

Chorus
You know he's not the king of Bedside Manor.
He's not the Tom Jones that lives next door.
He's not the king of Bedside Manor.
He hardly even lives there anymore.

He says excuse me, I hope you don't mind
that I followed you into this shop
but I couldn't help but notice that riding crop.
Sticking out of your haversack, um,
I wouldn't mind riding you bareback.
He's subtle on the dancefloor and he's suave around the bar.
He's a quickdraw with a lighter, he's a pseudo movie star.
You know he was quite a singer, quite an actor
quite some time ago.
He had quite a famous program, late night bedtime tv show.

Chorus

Well he opens up the curtains at the crack of dawn
just to see the lovely ladies who have come and gone.
From the house next door to his house on the lane
He consoles himself that he's got his health and he knows he can't complain.

Chorus

He's not the King of Bedside Manor
He's not the King of Bedside Manor
Hardly even lives there anymore.

Domo Arigato Mr. Roboto

He's not the king, he's not the king, he's not the king of Bedside Manor.

If i had $1000000 (if i had $1000000)
I'd buy you a house (i would buy you a house)
If i had $1000000 (if i had $1000000)
I'd buy you furniture for your house
(maybe a nice chesterfield or an ottoman)
If i had $1000000 (if i had $1000000)
I'd buy you a k-car (a nice reliant automobile)
If i had $1000000 i'd buy your love.

If i had $1000000 i'd build a tree fort in our yard.
If i had $1000000 you could help, it wouldn't be that hard.
If i had $1000000 (maybe we could put a little tiny fridge in there somwhere.)
We could just go up and hang out. (open the fridge and stuff. there would be
Food laid out for us, little pre-wrapped sausages and things.) mmmm. (they have
Pre-wrapped sausages but they don't have pre-wrapped bacon.) can you blame
Them? (well, yeah!)

If i had $1000000 (if i had $1000000)
I'd buy you a fur coat (but not a real fur coat that's cruel)
If i had $1000000 (if i had $1000000)
I'd buy you an exotic pet (like a llama or an emu)
If i had $1000000 (if i had $1000000)
I'd buy you john merrick's remains (ooh all them crazy elephant bones)
If i had $1000000 i'd buy your love

If i had $1000000 we wouldn't have to walk to the store
If i had $1000000 we'd take a limousine 'cause it costs more
If i had $1000000 we wouldn't have to eat kraft dinner.
But we would eat kraft dinner. well of course we would we'd just eat more. and
Buy all the fanciest ketchups for it...dijon ketchup! mmmm..

If i had $1000000 (if i had $1000000)
I'd buy you a green dress (but not a real green dress that's cruel)
If i had $1000000 (if i had $1000000)
I'd buy you some art (a picasso or a garfunkel)
If i had $1000000 (if i had $1000000)
I'd buy you a monkey (haven't you always wanted a monkey?)
If i had $1000000 i'd buy your love

If i had $1000000, if i had $1000000
If i had $1000000, if i had $1000000
If i had $1000000
I'd be rich.