I'm Not Waiting

You're a beautiful boy
With all your little toys
Your eyes have seen the world
Though you're only four years old
And your tears are streaming
Even when you're smiling
Please never be afraid to cry

You're a beautiful boy
With all your little ploys
Your mind has changed the world
And you're now forty years old
You got all you can carry
And still feel somehow empty
Don't ever be afraid to fly

All you beautiful boys
Creating multiple plays
You like to fence in your world
And settle down when you're old
You can run from pole to pole
And never scratch your soul
Don't be afraid to go to hell and back
Don't be afraid to go to hell and back
Don't be afraid to be afraid

I know they all:
Can smile with perfect teeth
Got knives to rip off my skin
Are living in this toxicity
I know they all

I know they all will turn their backs on me
Give me a reason
So I can trust you
Iâ??m trying hard
But cannot change anything
About the way
I am

The world I live
In here is getting cold
I watch the leaves fall down
Watch myself growing old
Iâ??d like to sleep all the time
But itâ??s hard to ignore
It would be easier if I knew what I am fighting for

The way I am
Everything's disordered
The way I am
In this poor world
The way I am
Everything's disordered
The way I act
In this poor world

I thank you all
For beating and dissing me
For shouting and pissing at me
For being such grateful enemies
For being a comprehensible symmetry