Funk Your Head Up

[kool keith]

Ahhh... it's time to relax
For all the people out there, it's time to take a break
A little intermission
Go urinate, get a little popcorn, stuff like that

[ced gee]

Ahh yeah, or get that quart of old gold
Or a banana

[kool keith]

If you wanna jerk off or two
Anything you know

[ced gee]

Or a cup of coffee
Whatever turns you on, take that break
Yeahhh...
And right about now

[kool keith]

We're going back to the funk!

[kool keith]
You wanna know my business? i got things to do
People to meet, people to see
Very important - matters to turn to
A waste of time for me to try to burn you
And talk a minute, you're not worth a conversation
I speak intelligently, with information
Goin and flowin and showin, you're still growin
Adolescent -- with a childish mind
Your brain is small, plus it's hard to find
I need a microscope, to see a two-cent brain
That don't think, when they rob and steal
And rape and kill -- and murder their loved ones
Now put your brain in the guillotine
Slice it to cold cuts, you're goin nuts ? cell
You wanna low rate me?
You're better off in hell, feel the flame
Fire burn roast and toast
Let me hear you scald, while i brag and boast
I keep your brain on stand-by
Cause it's the message, comin straight from the boss!

[ced gee]
Your attention please, come on, let me try this
This beat is funky -- so i just
Made up some rhymes that are hyper than hyperspace
Ced gee will kick bass, eliminate
Rappers who think quick slick with a few tricks
Can't be quick fixed if they try this
Man, and, aiyyo, i have the right to be
On any stage and mic someone can pass to me
Cause, i'm in there, and i swear
I'm like vladimir, no one bet-ter
Step to me, get to me, or pes-ter me
Confess to me, guessin me
Adressin me, be less than me, or testin me
Because, it only brings out the best in me
Soul, no - here's what you really need to do
Instead of battlin you need to really improve
Our race, and every other race
Bring em together -- and let's face
The problems, that we need to be solvin
People are dyin, starvin, robbin
Bein discriminated from different jobs
And things like that so think about that
We have a tool to use that they call rap
So, yo, let's use it, not abuse it
And in the long run, we have improved this
Situation and turned into a positive
They doubted this, so we're proud of this
Institution we invented of course
That's why this message, is comin from the boss!

[kool keith]
Yeah ced.. {*echoes*}

Once again, i hear your garbage on my radio
Left to right, and comin through my stereo
I turn it off, go off without show-off
Blow off mc's who can't talk or read or write
Or learn, stutter - i think you need to go ?rift?
But watch me shift
The smarter i get, the dumber you get
The better i get, the wacker you get
Ha ha hah, i gotta laugh - mc's are very funny to me
And on easter, they're like a bunny to me
Hoppin around, without a education
Formation, results in occupation
Better skills, how to sign a application
For a job, but you'd rather be a slob
A parasite, eating corn off the cob
Beggin everybody, you got a dollar for crack?
I'll pay you back
Wednesday thursday friday saturday's here
Where's my money?
It ain't funny with a pipe in your face
For a fracture, last time the cops smacked ya
For hittin your moms and pops
You need a shake in your brain, adolescent
I'm a vet, you're juvenile, and driven wild, meanwhile
You look stupid and petty, and now senile
How's time in jail without bail?
Now you're up for sale, you're like a prostitute
Another man's wife, on the la-la tip
Think about it again
Cause it's the message, comin straight from the boss!

{"here's a little story that must be told.."}
Ahh yes yes y'all, and you don't stop
{"here's a little story that must be told.."}
You're listenin to the sounds, of the best mc, in the world..
Koooooooooooooool keith! {*echoes*}
{"go off, and go off.."}

[kool keith]
I got a flyer in my hand, bambaataa with cold crush
The place is packed, with johnny wa and rayvon
Lovely ladies smellin sweet, with a lot of avon
Jazzy jay by my side, charlie chase behind me
Flash and theodore, super cuts that blind me
"catch a groove" is the rhythm, spinnin back and forth
From the east and the valley, swingin back up north
Towards the south bronx, euceda park and webster
The speakers are pumpin, power bass is thumpin
With the ultramega amp, keepin pep up, jumpin
From side to side, the double meters'll peak
They had some good mc's, a lot of them, they was weak
They no style with no metaphor, no voice to speak
Melle mel had the best rhymes, rankin with caz
Kool moe tried to get down, but i made him sit down
With that metaphor quickness, you bite and you bit this
Stop and go turn, see the flame and go burn
To ashes to ashes, dust to dust
Seven years later toy you still crusty crust
Your old rhymes are rust, very dirty and dusty
And under your arms you're kickin power and musty
Get out of my way, and let the rhythm path roll
Let me run up the charts, freak a rhyme turn gold
While you're listenin, i throw a buzz in your ear
Bust the facts!

{"yes yes y'all.."} {"innovative.."}
{"let's rock, get bigger.."}
{"yes yes y'all.."} {"innovative.."}
{"let's rock, get bigger.."}
{"yes yes y'all.."} {"innovative.."}
{"let's rock, get bigger.."}

Now swing your partner around, dosey-dosey
Like musical chairs and ring around the rosie
The party you pace see, kool herc with j.c.
The herculoids battle, the disco twins
Funky rhymes with breakbeats, the dj spins
For the l brothers, steppin right in the scene
Mean gene was maxin, rockin rob went to work
While the tables would turn, the old needles used to jerk
With the belt drive, technics and b-1's
With the orange light shinin, the red on d-1's
Direct drive and nova, i'm chillin with g.l.o.b.e.
Mr. biggs and pow-wow, monk and superman
Pullin out that olde e, that funky funky 40 ounce
Ikey c from cosmic, the bass bottom bounce
Red alert in the booth, the t-connection to mix
Silly rabbit.. you know my style has trix
To go on, to the next line, to the break of dawn
While i move up step, to the early early morn
With a hip-hop drink and some rhyme popcorn
Never smokin or sniffin or ever jokin or riffin
Because it's time to plex more, and rhyme fantastic
Donald rock and whipper whip, neither rapper was plastic
Back in the days, you had to be so sarcastic
To stretch out a rhyme, and make it double elastic
You learn new jack, step back and be wack
You know what time it is boy, and every mic i smoke
Bust the facts!

{"yes yes y'all.."} {"innovative.."}
{"let's rock, get bigger.."}
{"yes yes y'all.."} {"innovative.."}
{"let's rock, get bigger.."}
{"yes yes y'all.."} {"innovative.."}
{"let's rock, get bigger.."}
{"yes yes y'all.."} {"innovative.."}
{"let's rock, get bigger.."}

Later on at the boys club, while tom excel
I got a name for your brain that surely rings a bell
Patti duke had the nice hands, swift with billy boy
Playin james brown records, you stupid you silly boy
Bongo rockin, hard where the rhythm go
You fake and pass, busy bee give and go
To the aj scratch, a funky beat that matched
With a two-second break, that was hard to catch
Dst was mixin, slicin with his elbows
Freakin the wheels, loopin rhymes, here we go
To the master faster, speed up and go faster
Turn my jvc to mega power and blast the
Mario tape, yes the disco king
With the b-side the funky drums, no new jack swing
Happy rappers with polka dots, were bound to get stuck
You had the zulus the nine crew, you're pushin your luck
The casanovas was maxin all scheamin to duck
You had the black spades, plus the savage skulls
Gangbangin was over, neither crew is exist
They got a job and a wife, a pretty woman to kiss
So on the rhymes kept rollin, straight up into disco
Eddie cheeba was sweet g, and back up to cisko
And freaker islam, with the great love squids
Spinnin high-top beats, can you check it, you dig
Kool keith out smokin, my lyrics are hot
Bust the facts!

{"innovative.."}
{"let's rock, get bigger.."}
{"yes yes y'all.."} {"innovative.."}
{"let's rock, get bigger.."}
{"yes yes y'all.."} {"innovative.."}
{"let's rock, get bigger.."}
{"yes yes y'all.."} {"innovative.."}
{"let's rock, get bigger.."}

[woman] hellooh?
[voice] hey, hey woman where was you at last night?

[tim dog]
Ahhh yeahhh
Right about now we're gonna get into somethin real smooth
This is the story about a man and a woman
The man tried to kick, the woman fronts
He gets large, now she wants
Let's look in on the story
As this man's tellin this girl, about herself
Yeah..

[kool keith]
See girl, you look stupid now
And i gotta tell you somethin straight in your face
You played yourself like a big-time toy from mattel
Tryin to flaunt the little bit of what you got
Why don't you go on over there and let him diss you again?
See your girlfriends laughin and lookin at me at the same time?
But right now i'm gettin ready to wash my hands
And get all the dirt off, yeah

Back in the days, see you never had the time
To come to my house, and let me tell you that i rhyme
You always made excuses, such as
"i'm sleepin right now, call me back," no nevermind
Cause you and your friends are very hard to find
Lisa, pamela, angela, renee
The girls who shoplift, and steal everyday
Lookin for benz's, food and a hamburger
Just to connive and rob a brother for cheese
That ain't right girl, in your fantasy world
I call you once - you never dialed back
Twice - you never dialed back
Saturday morning, live, i'm on soul train
Talkin to don cornelius
Saturday night, my phone rings
Saturday night, i won't answer
Saturday night, my phone rings again
Saturday night, i don't answer
Finally, i cold screened the call - hello?
"hello? hey keith, it's me baby. i miss you!
Where you been at all this time? whatchu been doin?
Hey you think we can hang out tonight?
Y'know, we really gotta talk.
You still workin in the grocery store?" please!
{*keith hangs up phone*} stop jockin me girl

Chorus: {*singers*} + ced gee

Stop jockin me girl.. (you're jockin me baby)
Stop jockin me girl! (slow down, you're clockin me baby)
Stop jockin me girl.. (you're jockin me baby)
Stop jockin me girl! (yeah, you're jockin me baby)

[tim dog]
Ha ha ha hah
Here we have the same scenario, but different people
We have a young man who's been followed by a secret admirer
She too once fronted on the rap
Let's look in on his story, and see what happens

[ced gee]
Uh uh baby you know what? you really need to check yourself
Yo i find this is sad, that here we are in the 20th century
And y'know you still practicin these primitive tactics
Y'know jockin a brother when he gets large
Check yourself baby
Let me step over here and do my thing..

.. like this!
Yo b-boy comrades, this girl she keeps jockin me
Regardless what i say, she's constantly clockin me
Houndin me like a pest, callin like she's obsessed
I tell her she'll never get, me but she'll never let
The situation rest for a day or two
We're goin on tour, trev said, "i'll bet she'll follow you"
And boy was he right, i know you're probably wonderin
This girl like a groupie, followed me into london
Show for show, state to state, night after night
Hotel to hotel, and even the airports
She tried to play me close
Now could you believe, she tried to play high-post
At one time, before i made a record
She wasn't sure it was me, so then, she had to check it
She turned on the video, show on the tv
She couldn't believe it was me, on the big screen
Performin the hit, yeah the record was kickin brother
From that day on, the girl, tried to smother
Me like a blanket, but i wasn't havin it
I wasn't a grocery, and she wasn't baggin it
So i took my time, looked her in the eye
And said -- stop jockin me girl

Chorus: {*singers*} + ced gee

Stop jockin me girl.. you're daily jockin me
(you're jockin me baby)
Stop jockin me girl! ahh girl, you're a hooker
(you're jockin me baby)
Stop jockin me girl.. girl i can't, get with you
(you're jockin me baby)
Stop jockin me girl! (you're jockin me baby)
Said won't ya, get away from me..

[tim dog]
So there you have it
Typical situation of jockin
First you fronted, now you want it
For all you girlies thinkin about jockin somebody
I suggest you don't do it, or you will get dissed
Peace out

I get in shape and do my physical fitness
Your head's numb, so your brains a miss this
Pick 'em up, eat 'em up, pick 'em up, beat 'em up
Pick 'em up pimplehead, pick 'em up picky
I roll wit globs and i come real sticky
Ripping the mic, i plug it up in your ears
Crazed and brewer. i'm coming out like beers
Like rheingold, miller, coors, and buds
I'm a eat 'em wit popcorn and treat 'em like suds you duds
Coming out the wick wack, wicky, wickable wack
Black jack, that's a fact, writing exact behind your back
The funk rhyme to master, blaster
Kicking up in a brainstorm, rainstorm
Rap storm, rap form
Rap time, rap rhyme
Rap class, i'm here to fail and to pass
To continue, from the more, hype tip
I roll and rock, rock and roll
Jazz and pop, rhythm and blues
Dance and fusion, pain confusion
Look at the lights, what a night on the town
I'm poppa large, big shot on the east coast(4x)

Now i'm back to funk, freak the funk
Hype the funk, swipe the funk and all that junk
I get busy on 'em, communicate wit the world
Man, woman, a baby boy and a girl
Poppa large looking out the pawn shop
Taking stroud while your face and arms drop
Stop, look, learn to read, learn to write
Learn to talk, learn to walk
And watch your step though, i'm hype and ripe though
Kleptomaniac, my rhyme is psycho
A ricky ricardo, a guy lombardo
Sporting a ragtop, an el dorado
Step into hollywood, i'm screening the boulevards
The rhymes is gain type, i'm ready to pull it's card
Jack or ace, king or queen, call me the deuce
I'm pouring la juice
Hitting the top, feeling the rim
Getting a trim, i never rhyme like them
On and on, on and on, on and on
Until the break of dawn
I go overtime, rock the mic in nighttime
Daytime, switching off to primetime
Specifically, strolling back in the west time
Rock the funk wit the mic in the east rhyme
Hype and dope, hype the frame, the mic is smoking
Yo, i ain't joking
Rhyme to kill, rhyme to murder, rhyme to stomp
Rhyme to ill, rhyme to romp
Rhyme to smack, rhyme to shock, rhyme to roll
Rhyme to destroy anything toy boy
On the microphone
I'm poppa large, big shot on the east coast(4x)

You're dripping sweaty, coming hard on your neck
As i flow and grow from head to toe
Seeking a style like john mcenroe
Dissing 'em all, serving them wit the mic stand
Like prince and michael coming out wit a big band
The crowd is loud, you can pay as teh manager
Run wit the money, i pull the trigger and damage ya
Boom, taking life more serious
I may sound lyrical and very mysterious
Rhymes are grip tight, no grams to kill more
A son of sam, how could i begin more
Grabbing the mic, you see the dark and shadows
You're in living hell, the funk, pound to pound
The funk ignited, hands are writing, brains dividing
I'm coming out in sighting
Like i'm blackula, a better man that dracula
Spectacular and not irregular
In fact you are speaking impopular
Rhymes are moved and you can't be stop wit the
Beat as it goes to the rhyme that flows
Like a coke in a straw burning up in your nose
That's a bad habit, stepping out on stage one
Drop the mic, come and turn to page one
Look at the master, my range is higher
My lyrical burns, your brain's on fire
Poppa large, big shot on the east coast(8x)

[kool keith]

Yo i met this fine motherfuckin bitch last night man
Pussy taste like strawberries man
I was up in the crib chillin...
...and spendin much cash

[ced gee]

Yo i hear you man
Them big shot bitches be perpetrating
And you still be taking a loss
Look at donald trump!

[kool keith]

I know a bitch named dolly, she live uptown
She got a fly new benz, kid of asian brown
Every night she would front and try to flex on the x
For no reason, with that diamond and stud shit
With two other girls, on that glamour and big shit
Walkin around, at apollo and bentley
Sportin the weave, like the queen of the centuries
Lookin for buster, holyfield and tyson
Jordan and sugar ray, a cake with icing
Dolly walked in, with a tiger-striped mink coat
Her friend had on some shit, i think it was billy goat
Tryin to play all and many boogie down brothers out
Regular b-boys, the crew, and others out
Steppin to bar, the first order was champagne
Dolly had a fat ass, with tina and charmagne
Lookin for tank four, on e with no gain
The benz was outside, parked with no gas
Bitches inside, frontin hard in first class
Tryin to play the x, like fucked up tv
Lookin for green to get to washington d.c.
You give him his car back, money and coat back
Shoes and hat back, the credit you're known for
Hoein out of state with the big drug dealers
From east to west and only cash money stealers
Charlie got much shit, them bitches are eatin well
You say to yourself, i'm al capone, so what the hell
Damn... i jerked three hundred g's
I coulda put out a group with ten or twenty mc's
And made megabucks, but you never did realize
Dolly was shifty with her lips and chinky eyes
Never had a dime, but know how to get one
Jerk one take one, out for a long ride
With tina and charmagne, bums on e side
Lookin for bm's, cherokees and jaguars
Benzes and audis, for the brothers with jettas
Watch yourself, and step away from the rat trap

[tr love]
Yeah
Smooth in the groove
Yo whassup man, what's up, what's goin on man, what's happenin?

[kool keith]
Yo whassup this is the one, rhythm x, x-calibur
One two, funk ignitor plus (yeah)
Comin at ya at thirty degrees.. farenheight (ha ha)
The heat is on your ears
Right now we gettin ready to get busy on w-k-r-funk radio live!
(we'll burn ya!) with tr love (and moe love on the set)
And we talkin to y'all from los angeles
Live, on w-k-r-funk radio, our own station

See rappers don't know, i snatch a beat
I hear a beat, i catch a beat
The rhythm x roll up, my style gets critical
Brain connects, computer rhymes get phsyical
I walk low, and howl with no afro
X with a bald head, like fidel castro
Walk in a jam, with the mic and my girlfriend
While two girls are buggin, sayin, "keith is my boyfriend!"
But i come back though, start the attack though
Add up some points, like i'm playin nintendo
Now look at the game, i move step in first place
Leave em all blind for hard times and third base
Back to bake em more, fizzle and burn though
But you can't see the record sizzle and turn though
Hittin the top like a hot 45
Like, "ahh - ahh - ahh - ahh - stayin alive, stayin alive"
Yeah, gettin back into business
Rappers get back and do some physical fitness
Jumpin jacks, situps and pushups
Now pick up your brain, and come and lift up some heavy weights
Stupid you're dumb, standin still with dead weight
Rappers try to plex, i mark x
I stamp x, and throw em another x
X-tra rhythm flow, x-tra metaphor
X-tra hype and dope, x-tra cupid feet
X-tra body heat, x-tra brain power
X-tra cash flow, you soft cauliflower
But i do get swift, change the pitch if
You got the rhymes and hammer foots to dance with
Yo, let's get the dead party jumpin
Rappers are crazy wack, and ain't sayin nothin
While people are steady, sweaty tired and boring
Let me go on, steppin to and flow on
And so on, turn the mic in my show on
Please the crowd with some super dope hype stuff
Lyrical metaphor, and some of that right stuff
Shakin your brain up, wakin your brain up
Confusin your mind like a block or rubik's cube
Think about it, you probably don't understand
With a lower iq, a weak brain my man
So listen up, and go on back to school
Fool.. you ain't jack

Yeah that's comin live from w-k-r-funk
With dj moe love, tr love
We gon', bring it out, by special request
For tr funky love

[tr love]
Yeah, thanks a lot for that funky introduction rhythm x
I appreciate it
Yeah the phones are lightin up crazy
We want the 103rd caller to come in
And win them disco pants in the contest
Now if you ready for some more live hype stuff
So here it is..

Some rappers can flow and, rock off the slow jam
Stay hype, continously, cause i know i can
Rock off tempo, fast or even hyper
Just like a sniper, pied microphone piper
Smooth rough and ready, hardcore stanyin steady
In the lane, rock'n'roll ready
On, any, mc type wannabe like
Had to sound like, gots to be like
Wants to look like, has to act like
Now you feel like.. hmm
You know you're perpetrating? yeah right
C'mon face it, and then chase it
You can taste it, cause i placed it
Smack in your face, with five million lbs of bass
Boomin systems ads can't replace
In fact all, the rhythm is packed on tightly
+days of thunder+? not likely
Fact or fiction, while i got you scheamin
You ain't ready boy, i caught you sleepin
And searchin for a dope style, combine to watch our
Freestyle, straight from the penile
Buckwild, runnin wild with the golden mic
I'm like a flash, first you see, then you lose sight
Of the master tr, plan in hand
Destroyin a foe, who's not in demand
So act now, and for the fact now
There's no doubt in my mind, i'll be rap now
C'mon on man, c'mon!
Yo, mc's, you say you're comin back?
Huh, yo, you ain't jack.. jack.. jack.. jack.. jack..

[kool keith]
Jack.. jack.. jack.. jack..

[tr love]
Yeah, ha hah, ha hah, ha hah..