1. _ N°1's cooking
Everyone is twisted
Except the girl with the funny tattoo on her ankle
Funny tattoo on her knee, (I wish it was me)
Money and pleasure make me tick,
Enough to make you sick
She's a modern muse, With a mixed up bruise
Whichever way you're looking
No.1's the one that's cooking
But we've all got our place, This planet's got its funny ways
We just have a good time, (They have a bad time)
It's just awful doing nothing, When everything's so fine
Treading on a fragile line, We can't ignore the suffering
(But we do)
Chorus
And when the leaves turn brown
I hope I've still got my feet on the ground
It's too easy to feel guilty
Basically it's got to be said, That anyone with a pretty head
Could save the world instead, And I'm a guilty girlish thing
But charity makes my ego ring
Chorus
And all that is just twisted
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2. _ Muscleman
He's a muscleman, Such a muscleman
Muscle up to him, He'll let you rub his tan
He's a muscleman, Such a muscleman
Muscle in with him, He'll let you hold his hand
I'm now an apple. that suits me fine
And I'm out of time, But we'll all be fine
And now I'm knackered and feeling kind
But I'm not even worth a dime
And that suits me fine, And that suits me fine
Chorus
He's a muscleman, Such a muscleman
He's a muscleman, Yeah, he's my muscleman
I'm not an apple in a line, I'm in that way inclined
For God's sake be mine, And please don't go blind
Cos I've got this apple, And it needs a habit
And now I'm out of time, But you're a friend of mine
And we'll both be fine, And not out of line
Again you'll be mine, And that suits me fine
Yeah that suits me fine, He's a muscleman...
He's my muscleman
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3. _ Motorbike to heaven
I'm gonna drive my motorbike to heaven
I'm gonna slice a lemon in two
And when the charcoal's burning bright
We'll be there, in heaven
I'm gonna fly my motorbike to you
I don't know why
But I've got a good idea that
We'll meet again some day
It makes me cry
There's a memory of you
Standing in the woods
And then they sigh
'cause they've got a good idea
That my hair is full of ferns
I'm gonna shine my hair in blooms
Because my mind is full of you
I think I'm gonna dust my room
'cause there's a notice in my head
I'm gonna shine my bike instead
'cause that's what the notice said
Repeat 1st verse
I don't know why
But I've got a good idea that
We'll meet again some day
It makes me cry
You're standing on a yacht and
I don't know what to say
I dreamt last night
We were playing kiss and tell then
I watched you fly away
Well there's a diamond in my car
And it's shining like a star
I feel I'm coming home to you
'cause there's a message in my soup
And it could be like yesterday
I wish you'd never gone away
Repeat 2nd and 3rd verses
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4. _ Nothing happens
Waiting upstate in the pines
There's a man
Whose arms are twisted round the vines
Looking out for her to show
But she's late
The sound of the crickets all around
In the heat
In the heat
They say you'll sell
Your body to the heat
So he takes his muslin bag
To the well
Runs his fingers through his hair
He's unwell
Then the sea comes into view
And he moves downhill
Meets his car down by the bay
Drives away
Chorus:
Come on now - gotta take it in your stride...
Well a fugitive can run but he can't hide
Nothing happens in the town
Nothing moves
A lone mosquito settles down
On a shoe
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5. _ A man with a box
In the 1920s a man with a box came to stay
In the 1930s the man with a box went away
In the 1940s a man with a box went beserk
In the 1950s the man with a box left for work
A man with a box could be loving and he knows it
But a man with a box don't work that way
A man with a box could be loving if he tried it
But his rainclouds are permanently grey
In the 1960s a man with a box opened up
In the 1970s the man with a box drained his cup
In the 1980s a man with a box came along
And in the 1990s a man with a box wrote this song
Chorus
A man with a box made a train escape from Euston
While his butterflies went wild in the woods
The police report stated that every year at Margate
The daisies grew a different shade of brown
Man...
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6. _ Machine of menace
I'm versatile, Removable
I'm reversible, So edible
I'm the Machine of Menace
You put me in your place
So go on, the pleasure's mine
I gotta see your face
You put me in your place
So go on, I gotta see your face
I'm versatile, I'm flexible
I'm physical, Quite murderous
I'm the Machine of Menace
Chorus
Show me your face
I gotta see your face
Cos you put me in your place
So go on, the pleasure's mine
I gotta see your face
Incurable, Rememberable, I'm increasable
In fact delectable, Machine of Menace
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7. _ Warmth of the hearth
Say it's not so
I can't even chant in the bath
I'm so alone
I'm coming home
I need the warmth of the hearth
The antique phone
Here comes the hearth
We're almost there baby
I'm on the path
Missing you already
Here comes the hearth
We're almost there baby
On the path
Say it's not so
Many's the dog that we've sent on the way
Down below I'm coming
I need the warmth of the flames
On my bones
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8. _ Gertrude Campbell
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9. _ Shepherds' isle
Don't take me there tonight
To the Sheperd's Isle
They say there's people walking in
Towelling dressing gowns
Awaiting trial
I don't want to go
I don't need to know
I don't want to go, a-ha...
The hounds hunt in fives
Gnashing teeth will eat you alive
So board this boat with me
Why so shaky, can't you see?
Chorus
Come all ye faithful
Tractor salesmen from hell
And when we're walking walking
We know we don't walk too well
I feel like crumbling buildings
With dust on the windowsills
It's such a mindless island
I feel like paying boredom bills
This boredom really kills
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10. _ N
Everyone is twisted
Except the girl with the funny tattoo on her ankle
Funny tattoo on her knee, (i wish it was me)
Money and pleasure make me tick,
Enough to make you sick
She's a modern muse, with a mixed up bruise
Whichever way you're looking
No.1's the one that's cooking
But we've all got our place, this planet's got its funny ways
We just have a good time, (they have a bad time)
It's just awful doing nothing, when everything's so fine
Treading on a fragile line, we can't ignore the suffering
(but we do)
Chorus
And when the leaves turn brown
I hope i've still got my feet on the ground
It's too easy to feel guilty
Basically it's got to be said, that anyone with a pretty head
Could save the world instead, and i'm a guilty girlish thing
But charity makes my ego ring
Chorus
And all that is just twisted
more free lyrics |
11. _ Your ma
I've got an itch that I can't fix
I'm gonna get your mother to mix me a drink
Just think
She takes my hand to put it up her skirt
I'll call you up to dish the dirt on her
So it doesn't reoccur
Your Ma will do it
I don't know where to hide
Before I know it her hand's inside
I know the damage that she can do with her hands untied
I try to keep her on hubbie's work
But if I don't stop she'll think I'm a jerk
A jerk
Chorus
Go on!
Upper grade...
I've got a problem with someone's mum
But she relieves me of my daily humdrum
And while I stand there taking off her dress
I guess I'm in a mess
Cos she wants a boy with the teenage drive
And knock his socks off his teenage life
And then I remember - She's your daddy's wife
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12. _ Drink the elixir
The ground is getting frosty
Then small drops of mint on my scarf
My lifespan is an unknown
I've never strayed far from the path
I'll wrap myself in bandages
And leopard skin and bandages
And nobody will bother me
I'll wrap myself in bandages
Till it gets ridiculous
And nobody will bother me
Drink the Elixir
With Saturn on the stopwatch
There's hope for me yet on this Earth
But Venus had an off day
A century's gone by since my birth
I'll wrap myself in bandages
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13. _ Overhear me
The Bechstein was our lifeline
We could see our faces in the shine
And know it wasn't over
You never said you loved me
Even when we crowded out
The children from the sofa
I hope you overhear me
I hope you overhear me
When I'm uttering my name for you
In case collected copies of The Times
Get faded before ninety nine
The trunk will stay locked shut
In the garden the ritual was
Acted out under every tree
Shame my favourite scenes were cut
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14. _ Granite statue
Sitting in a garden with
A face like a granite statue
I am winter solstice waiting
Like a granite statue
Just like a granite statue
I will come when the weather's fine
Just like a granite statue
I want to know what's on your mind
Every single time that I come here
I can't tell you what I feel
I am so polite to you and courteous
I know that it's not real
I long to grab a hold of you
And take you in my arms tonight
But when I feel I'm going to
My courage flies away and I turn cold
Just like a granite statue
Statue, is that you, statue
Just like a granite statue
I will come when the weather's fine
But I'm a granite statue
And I know you'll not ever be mine
Just like a granite statue
Statue, is that you, statue...
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15. _ Man With a Box
In the 1920s a man with a box came to stay
In the 1930s the man with a box went away
In the 1940s a man with a box went beserk
In the 1950s the man with a box left for work
A man with a box could be loving and he knows it
But a man with a box don't work that way
A man with a box could be loving if he tried it
But his rainclouds are permanently grey
In the 1960s a man with a box opened up
In the 1970s the man with a box drained his cup
In the 1980s a man with a box came along
And in the 1990s a man with a box wrote this song
A man with a box could be loving and he knows it
But a man with a box don't work that way
A man with a box could be loving if he tried it
But his rainclouds are permanently grey
A man with a box made a train escape from Euston
While his butterflies went wild in the woods
The police report stated that every year at Margate
The daisies grew a different shade of brown
Man...
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16. _ No. 1's Cooking
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